IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.
#show #changes #ownership #appliances #amount #time #housework #households #country
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this
Linking Words
 lain chart depicts the Percentage of
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
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 who have
a electrical appliances
Correct the article-noun agreement
an electrical appliance
electrical appliances
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 from 1920 to 2019
Linking Words
overall It
Correct your spelling
Overall it
show examples
 is clear from the graph that, in 1920 the family
has
Verb problem
did
show examples
 not have any ideas about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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washing Maschen and after almost 100 years the washing machine is the most
Correct your spelling
popular
papulr
Correct your spelling
popular
 machine in the country
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown, in the percentage of electrical
appliances
Add a comma
appliances,
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 the Vacuum cleaner it has 30%
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in 1920 after almost 100 years in 2019 taking a Hugh increased to 100%
an
Correct your spelling
and
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 seam
plaes
Correct your spelling
places
plates
 washing machine have the best
increased
Replace the word
increase
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 from 0% in 1920 to 100% in 100 years
Linking Words
secondly
Add a comma
secondly,
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 the number of Number of
hours
Use synonyms
 of housework per week
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
has a
hugh
Correct your spelling
huge
 decreased from 50
Hours
Use synonyms
 per week in 1920 to 10
Hours
Use synonyms
 per week so in the Country
having
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 almost 40
hours
Use synonyms
spending time
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
 with electrical appliances and he has Chang to 10
hours
Use synonyms
 and it is
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
things
Fix the agreement mistake
thing
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the
family’s
Unnecessary verb
family
show examples
 to save time and many
Submitted by osama22771234567 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • electrical appliances
  • housework
  • time frame
  • variables
  • trends
  • significant milestones
  • turning points
  • correlation
  • reduction
  • influenced
  • societal implications
  • quality of life
  • gender roles
  • economic implications
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