IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss ofparticular species ofplants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, there is a debate that the most crucial environmental problem is the extinction of some animal and plant
species
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, others believe that climate change and
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 are more essential than others.
This
Linking Words
 essay dives into both opinion and analysis of the problems.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, extinction of the vegetation and creatures affects each other.
For example
Linking Words
, recent studies show that the reef population has rapidly declined in the
last
Linking Words
 ten years because individuals throw their trash into the sea and the ocean and factories pour their toxic waste into the sea. When the reefs are destroyed, fish which live in the reef are going to extinct.
Moreover
Linking Words
, illegal hunting has extincted some animal
species
Use synonyms
 in previous years and these living
beings
Use synonyms
 make balance in the ecosystem, vegetation takes nutrition from animals' dirt and creatures take nutrition from plants.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 essay agrees that eliminating various
species
Use synonyms
 of animals and vegetation is the main issue.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, decreasing the
air
Use synonyms
 quality and increasing the temperature treat the living
beings
Use synonyms
 on
Earth
Use synonyms
. A recent study displays that using fossil flues decreases
air
Use synonyms
 quality in some cities
such
Linking Words
 as Quanzu and New Delhi and it increases the temperature all around the
earth
Use synonyms
,
as a result
Linking Words
, climates slowly differ in many areas.
For instance
Linking Words
, living
beings
Use synonyms
 use oxygen to continue to live but if
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 spreads to the whole
earth
Use synonyms
, some
species
Use synonyms
 will be extinct in the near future and because of fossil fuels, increasing temperatures melt the poles and raise the water level of the
earth
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, climate change and
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 are
also
Linking Words
 the most important issues. In conclusion, every environmental problem is crucial for living
beings
Use synonyms
 and they affect each other.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 climate change and atmosphere
pollution
Use synonyms
 are more major problems than others because they affect the whole world at the same time and lead to the extinction of different animal
species
Use synonyms
 around the
Earth
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Make sure to directly address the task given,
Task Achievement
Try to balance the coverage of both views before presenting your opinion.
Task Achievement
Consider providing more tangible examples and data to support your arguments for a stronger impact.
Coherence and Cohesion
Maintain clear topic sentences for each paragraph to enhance readability and coherence.
Coherence and Cohesion
Link ideas more smoothly by using a wider range of linking words and phrases.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively setting the stage and summarizing your opinion.
Task Achievement
You have shown an ability to discuss both views, which is commendable.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: