Write about the following topic: In many countries, international tourism has become an important source of income. However, it also has negative effects. Do the benefits of international tourism outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Tourism
has contributed to the income
of many countries
. In several countries
, international tourism
has become a critical source of wealth. While
tourism
attracts foreign wealth into the country
, it also
contributes to the overall
development
of the country
. Although
it does have some drawbacks, the benefits certainly outweigh the advantages.
The main point to be highlighted is how international tourists
bring more foreign currency, leading to the rise in economy
of the Add an article
the economy
country
and thus
improving its income
. What most countries
want is more foreign currency, especially the American Dollar to increase its economic state. All the money that the tourists
spend when coming into a country
, adds to the wealth of that country
, leading to further
development
of the nation. Moreover
, this
creates a vicious cycle where more development
means more facilities and more tourist-friendly attractions, attracting more travellers and further
raising the economy. For instance
, Maldives, an island in Asia attracts more than 1 million people a year and their major source of income
used for its growth is from tourism
.
Secondly
, It is important to note that money from international tourism
, is a leading unavoidable factor that determines the development
of a country
. Countries
with a high number of tourists
, attract international companies and brands. Whether it be food, clothing or other industrial companies, they tend to open multiple branches in tourist-prone areas. Opening of
these offices, not only gives more job opportunities to people, but it Change preposition
apply
also
forces other local companies to compete with them, overall
adding to more income
of
people and Change preposition
for
hence
the country
. With new ventures, the overall
income
rises and leads to more development
of the country
. For example
, Apple opened up 3 stores in Singapore due to
it being the country
that attracts a lot of technology-loving travellers from around the globe.
In conclusion, although
international tourism
does have some disadvantages like increased pollution, intense use of resources and cultural disputes, the magnitude with which it helps in the growth of a nation should not be omitted and more tourists
should definitely be welcomed, increasing the income
of a country
.Submitted by mshkrp2 on
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Language use
Your essay comprehensively addresses the topic with a well-formulated introduction and conclusion. To further improve, try to introduce more varied sentence structures and vocabulary to enhance the sophistication of your language.
Coherence & Cohesion
You've done a fantastic job of logically structuring your essay and using paragraphs to separate your ideas. For even better coherence, consider using more transitional phrases to flow smoothly from one idea to the next.
Task Response
You have provided clear and comprehensive ideas supported by relevant examples, which is excellent. To take your essay to the next level, deepen your analysis by exploring potential counterarguments or nuances in the impacts of tourism.
Content
Excellent job on including specific examples like the Maldives and Apple's stores in Singapore, which strengthen your arguments and make your essay more convincing.
Structure
Great work on maintaining a clear and logical structure throughout your essay, which makes it easy for the reader to follow your arguments.
Introduction and Conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame your argument, showing a strong grasp of essay organization.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?