You have just started a course in a college which has no sports facilities of its own. Write a letter to the meneger of the nearest private sports club. In your letter × introduce yourself × say why you are interested in this sports club × ask some questions about the club e.g. facilities, members, costs

#course #college #sports #facilities #meneger #club #questions #e #g #members #costs

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to ask

information

Change preposition

for information

show examples

about

Muborak

Correct article usage

the Muborak

show examples

Sports

club

Capitalize word

Club

show examples

I am planning to attend soon. I am Sevinch Muxtorova and I have just started a course

Change preposition

show examples

a college. In

this

college

Add a comma

college,

show examples

I can learn other languages

such

as Korean, Russian and so on. I heard that

this

sports

club

exceed

Verb problem

more expensive

show examples

than other

sports

club

Fix the agreement mistake

clubs

show examples

this

city.

In addition

, in college that I am studying recently has no

sports

facilities, that's why I am interested in

this

club

. I like

sport

and

sport

is my thing. It will be

great

Add an article

a great

show examples

experience for me if I

Change the verb form

show examples

this

club

sport

entertainment

Replace the word

entertaining

show examples

and it keeps us healthy.

Also

, it

reliefs

Replace the word

relieves

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

stress,

for example

, when I am in stress, I do

sport

. There are

Correct article usage

a vareity

show examples

vareity

Correct your spelling

variety

of things I want to know about your

sports

club

. What kind of facilities have in your

club

and how much

Add a missing verb

do I

show examples

have to pay in a month? Please tell me about it and is it alright if I know how many

member

Change to a plural noun

members

show examples

has

Verb problem

are

show examples

club

Correct article usage

the club

show examples

. If there are so many people, I believe that,

this

club

is great. I look forward to hearing from you! I would appreciate it if you could inform me as soon as possible. You could send the above-mentioned information to my e-mail or a fax. Yours faithfully, Sevinch Muxtorova

Submitted by omondavlat91 on Thu Aug 15 2024

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task response

Ensure that you review and correct minor grammatical issues and improve sentence fluency. For example, 'I am writing to ask information about Muborak Sports club I am planning to attend soon.' could be 'I am writing to inquire about the Muborak Sports Club, which I am planning to join soon.'

coherence and cohesion

Organize your ideas into distinct paragraphs, each focusing on a single concept. This improves readability and logical flow.

task response

Use a consistent formal tone throughout the letter. Avoid phrases that may come across as too casual, such as 'sport is my thing.' Instead, you could say 'I am very passionate about sports.'

task response

The letter includes all the necessary information as per the instructions in the prompt: introduction, reason for interest, and specific questions about the club.

coherence and cohesion

The greeting and closing are well-formulated and appropriate for a formal letter.

coherence and cohesion

The main ideas are clear and logically ordered, which enhances coherence and cohesion.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

227 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays, people are not as fit and healthy as they used to be in the past which creates health issues in the long the run. What are the reasons? What can be done to solve this problem?

Some people say that we must send our parents to old age home when they reach 60. However other think that they must be taken care at home. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

the current layout of University Sports Centre with a plan to redesign it.

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. So, sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+