Many people believe that scientific research should be carried out and controlled by governments rather than private companies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some say that
government
should have complete control over scientific research.
While
governments must play an important role in technological advancement, I feel that collaboration between
government
and private funding would be more beneficial. People feel that governments should oversee scientific research for a variety of reasons.
To begin
, scientific study, by definition, necessitates enormous effort, time, and money. It is thought that only the
government
, with the well-being of the entire population in mind, can continually invest in these initiatives and will not sacrifice the long-term purpose for a short-term financial benefit.
Second,
some scientific
endeavors
Change the spelling
endeavours
show examples
, if allowed unchecked, are likely to produce social or ethical difficulties, undermining society's values.
For instance
, genetic engineering technology has sparked several debates and is presently subject to
government
oversight.
Finally
, most science funding comes from tax income;
as a result
, individuals want their tax dollars to be used under the supervision of
government
officials.
Nevertheless
, as long as these technological programs are driven by the
government
, I believe private sector engagement will undoubtedly contribute to the end aim. The fundamental reason is that
government
personnel are not professionals in either the scientific or business sectors, but private funds are more specialized in the implementation of scientific achievements since they are profit-driven. With genuine economic rewards achieved by those studies, relevant employees may be more encouraged to do more research.
Furthermore
,
government
personnel are occasionally understaffed and inefficient. Without
such
teamwork, people risk becoming overwhelmed by the volume of work and communication.
Finally
, I believe that academic studies may be carried out and marketed more effectively with the partnership of the
government
and private firms, given that officials rigorously regulate it.
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task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument which shows a balanced approach. To make your stance clearer, you could emphasize stronger statements and reiterate your position more confidently in the conclusion.
task achievement
Try to include more specific examples to support your points. For instance, mentioning specific government-funded projects or successful private sector research can make your argument more compelling.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear progression of ideas but could benefit from stronger transitions between paragraphs to enhance the overall coherence. Words like 'Moreover', 'Additionally', or 'However' could help bridge your points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear, distinct main idea and that each idea logically flows from one to the next.
coherence cohesion
Craft a more engaging conclusion that not only summarizes the main points but also reinforces your position with impact. This will leave a stronger impression on the reader.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-structured with an introduction, body, and conclusion, which makes it easy to follow.
task achievement
You have touched on several relevant points supporting both governments' and private sectors' roles in scientific research, showing a good grasp of the topic.
task achievement
The language used is generally clear and comprehensive, and you have shown an ability to convey your ideas effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • scientific research
  • government oversight
  • ethical guidelines
  • public interest
  • public funding
  • transparency
  • widespread access
  • long-term societal benefits
  • profit motive
  • biased findings
  • restricted research
  • collaboration
  • bureaucratic delays
  • political influence
  • innovation
  • regulations
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