Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
This
essay will make an effort to discuss the detrimental and profitable effects of zoo activity. There are two different sides, according to
which, one part of society supposes that it is a destructive and immoral phenomenon towards fauna, while
the second part disagrees and might provide a few beneficial factors of zoo functionality.
First of all, as a matter of fact, some people argue that it is an inhumane situation to hold animals in captivity by collecting them for personal reasons. As can be observed, lots of beasts are starting to be vulnerable being in cages. Moreover
, creatures in zoos can not realize themselves naturally, as they would in the wild, and thus
turn into non-active habitats.
On the other hand
, others do not support the first perspective and suggest a different argument. According to
the opposite site, there are several reasons why it is undoubtedly that zoos are essential and necessary for humanity. Firstly
, the research purpose plays an enormous role in the current issue. This
is because nowadays it is a great opportunity to investigate and learn more about animal groups by using zoos and other research places, for instance
, laboratories. This
is not a secret, that the young generation collects more information about animal life, which is also
positive. Additionally
, it is a considerable challenge to save and protect all types of fauna habitats. For the purpose of conservation, it is strategically vital to find a sanctuary for such
endangered species and create special breeding programmes.
To conclude
, although
both views certainly
have some validity, it seems to me that, in order to contribute to worldwide development, our human society has to improve its knowledge and generate new research projects. For
this
reason, we have to investigate flora and fauna consequently
.Submitted by akhmedova.mb on
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Task Response
Aim to develop a clearer position throughout - while you've discussed both views, making your own opinion more prominent could strengthen your argument.
Task Response
Include more specific examples to support each viewpoint. While your essay discusses general benefits and drawbacks, adding detailed examples will help demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
Coherence/Cohesion
Try to avoid abrupt endings to ensure a fully rounded conclusion. Expanding your conclusion to more clearly state your position and summarise the discussion would provide a stronger finish to your essay.
Coherence/Cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas and paragraphs more effectively. Although your essay has a clear structure, introducing more varied language for coherence could enhance readability and flow.
Task Response
Your essay introduces a balanced view on zoos, effectively outlining both the moral concerns and the benefits of their existence, which is excellent for task response.
Coherence/Cohesion
You have structured your essay with a clear introduction, discussion of both views, and a (somewhat brief) conclusion, which helps in maintaining a logical flow.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.