Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

To begin
,
smartphones
are utilized for long periods of daily life by few
children
. Increasing the technology in the present
time
so
children
use
phones
and
this
essay is a positive development for easy excess learning ability through the mobiles.
However
, the modernization period is dependent on technology as
smartphones
or online tools provide many things at home.
Additionally
,
Children
spend
time
playing video games on their laptops or computers and it might affect their offspring’s eyes if they spend a lot of
time
, adolescents should utilize gadgets for limited periods.
Furthermore
, Adolescents are painting and drawing with the
use
of artificial intelligence because it saves
time
but
children
lose their creativity.
For instance
, in the developing world, knowledge is being taken by online platforms which leads to easier access by phone.
Nevertheless
, if offspring
use
phones
for educational purposes, it can be beneficial for
children
because schools provide online classes for adolescents in their homes.
As well as
some special classes
such
as computer coding for newly interested
children
participants in their online programs.
Moreover
, some students
use
smartphones
for homework because educators send their work on these mobile
phones
.
In addition
, some students have a mathematical problem
then
they solve their questions within minutes by classes on
phones
.
For example
, in
india
Change the capitalization
India
show examples
most schools depend on online platforms for studying because it is more reliable. In conclusion, Presently,
smartphones
are being used by
children
to grow in technology and they can help to teach offspring in various types of subjects.
Submitted by psingh8059 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Consider enhancing your essay structure by having a clearer separation between paragraphs, each elaborating on a specific idea or argument.
argument balance
Strive for a more balanced approach to discussing positive and negative aspects, providing equal depth and detail to each side of the argument.
examples
Use more specific examples from your knowledge or experience to strengthen your arguments and make them more persuasive.
grammar
Work on sentence structure and grammar to improve readability and coherence. This includes ensuring subject-verb agreement and proper tense usage.
balance
You've made an effort to address both sides of the issue, mentioning the potential benefits as well as the drawbacks of children using smartphones.
conclusion
The conclusion succinctly summarizes your viewpoint, demonstrating an understanding of the essay's requirement.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
What to do next:
Look at other essays: