Some people think that it is good for a country’s culture to broadcast foreign films and TV shows. Others, however, think it is best to produce local films and shows. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. forgin = more, learn local = support local, maintain tradition
A conflict
have
arisen between two beliefs; the first side Change the verb form
has
is supporting
the idea of publishing foreign movies, Wrong verb form
supports
while
the other side prefers local TV shows. In this
report, I will go through both sides,
and Remove the comma
apply
then
allow me to share my point of view.
Foreign films are international, educational, and unique; as a consequence
, many people
prefer watching them. Firstly
, they are helpful to learn about various cultures at the same time. For further
explanation, many people
acknowledged that when they watch a foreign movie
that include
a variety of nationalities, they increase their knowledge about many customs. Change the verb form
includes
Secondly
, watching a movie
from another country more
attractive. Add a missing verb
is more
For example
, a survey showed that a lot of people
felt boring
when they watched a film from their own culture. Replace the word
bored
Also
, a report showed that to attract humankind, directors need to show them something new because it is normal in
humans to not excel watching an ordinary Change preposition
for
movie
if a unique, unusual, and extraodinary
Correct your spelling
extraordinary
movie
is available.
Although
the points mentioned above are strong, there are adverse points which hold equal strength. The first one is supporting local actors and actresses. For further
explanation, to make a successful TV show, directors need a local staff; as a result
, many citizens will get a job and will be able to present their traditions correctly. Besides
that, creating an
attractive TV shows helps to maintain the culture. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, reports indicate that because of technology, a lot of people
are losing and forgetting their customs as well as
some children are coping Change preposition
with others
others
traditions. Correct quantifier usage
other
However
, making local movies will help population
to remember and love their culture.
In conclusion, there are merits and demerits of Add an article
the population
the
both sides, but I believe that the advantages of broadcasting local films surpass the disadvantages.Remove the article
apply
Submitted by haneenalnetaif on
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Task achievement
Try to expand your examples more specifically with detailed scenarios or statistics to clarify and support your arguments better.
Coherence and cohesion
Be mindful of minor grammatical errors and typographical mistakes, as they can slightly hinder the clarity of your message. Proofreading can help reduce these.
Organization
Your essay is well-structured, presenting a clear introduction, balanced discussion of both views, and a summarized conclusion with your opinion, which is excellent for task response and coherence.
Language
You effectively use a range of vocabulary to express ideas, improving the quality and readability of the text.