some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is commonly believed that social networking services have significantly damaging effects on both individuals and the community. In my viewpoint, I partly agree with
this
statement,
whereas
I would argue that there are
also
a number of benefits in
this
field. On the one hand, social media can be a threat to our health and children's social circle.
According to
the latest survey, more than half population overuse electronic devices to check applications,
such
as Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter, which may lead to various eye problems. Myopia caused by blue light or eye strain caused by overuse of phones is a salient example.
Furthermore
, since it is less likely to be able to sift information online, it is easier to learn inappropriate behaviours and make strange new people on online platforms.
For instance
, the young tend to use Instagram to get to know strangers, whether they are good, which could influence the normal quality of making friends.
Therefore
, these platforms indeed bring a range number of disadvantages.
However
, using online media sites is beneficial for residents to broaden their international horizons and get a wide variety of positive knowledge.
To begin
with, when people use networking platforms, they can absorb different thoughts and state-of-the-art research to expand their knowledge throughout the world.
Moreover
, it is approachable access to track what friends are doing, which can stimulate peers to struggle harder for their work or study. To illustrate, if an adolescent sees his friend getting a bonus
due to
hard work, it may encourage him to work harder.
As a result
, society would become more positive as residents learn from each other through networking services. In conclusion, despite the fact that social media is detrimental to health and a range of making friends, it makes people get to know various knowledge and learn a more positive mindset and behaviours.
Submitted by ali.homayoni93 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Ensure there's a clear distinction between your introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph should have a single main idea supported by examples or explanations.
task achievement
It would be beneficial to include more specific examples and data to support your arguments, which would make your essay more convincing.
language use
Try to vary your sentence structures and vocabulary to enhance the readability and flow of your essay. This also helps to clearly differentiate your points and make the argument more compelling.
task response
You've done a great job of presenting a balanced view on the impact of social networking sites. Recognizing both the positive and negative sides makes your argument more nuanced.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-crafted, providing a clear overview of your essay's content and summarizing your viewpoint effectively.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • social isolation
  • virtual interactions
  • mental health
  • feelings of inadequacy
  • anxiety
  • depression
  • misinformation
  • destabilize
  • privacy concerns
  • data breaches
  • productivity
  • foster connections
  • educational content
  • social activism
What to do next:
Look at other essays: