Nowadays, the mobile phone plays a major role in our lives, which brings many benefits to us but also contains some drawbacks. What are the advantages and disadvantages?
Mobile phones are becoming more common on a regular basis, which provide both positive and negative effects on
people
and society. On the positive side, it enables people
to communicate with others more effectively and also
revolutionises news broadcasting methods. On the other hand
, relying on phones excessively could lead to several health issues, and also
lacking some essential life skills.
As for the benefits, the most prominent ones are the convenience and faster communication methods. With advanced technology, people
can connect to each other spontaneously through their personal devices in the form of texts or video calls online. Furthermore
, news agencies have changed their way of sharing the news, from televisions and newspapers to faster websites and social media platforms, such
as Twitter.
In contrast
, it is inevitable that when people
are exposed to too much screen time, it can cause health-related issues. For example
, blue light emitted from the screen could harm the eyes which eventually ends up with a permanent effect on the eyesight with myopia. Long screen time also
has psychological effects, with ADHD or other mental disorders. Moreover
, with the convenience of various applications, young adults who were accustomed to mainly utilise
the devices on fundamental daily activities, Wrong verb form
utilising
such
as Google Maps, may have less experience in doing things conventionally. And, they would face some difficulties, when they need to do things conventionally.
In conclusion, society receive
advantages in using phones, with faster and more convenient information transfer. Change the verb form
receives
However
, spending too much time with the device can cause some physical and psychological health problems, and a lack of basic life skills.Submitted by pimpisut.sata on
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coherence cohesion
To further improve, consider diversifying the vocabulary and sentence structures used in your essay to make it more engaging and to better demonstrate your linguistic capabilities.
task achievement
Expand on your ideas with more detailed examples or evidence to deepen the analysis of both advantages and disadvantages. This enhancement will strengthen your essay's persuasiveness and depth of insight.
task achievement
Your essay clearly presents both sides of the argument, effectively outlining the advantages and disadvantages of mobile phone use.
coherence cohesion
The structure of your essay, with distinct paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion, is commendable. This organization aids in making your argument more understandable and impactful.
Your opinion
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