IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that success is the best measure for intelligence, while others think that intelligence can be measured in other ways. What is your opinion?

Some believe that success is the main indicator of
intelligence
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 others argue that
intelligence
Use synonyms
 should be assessed through different methods. I
do not n’t
Rephrase
don’t
show examples
 agree with both affirmations, but there are some
things
Use synonyms
 to discuss. Sometimes a person reaches their top
intelligence
Use synonyms
 by passing a
lot
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 of problems and lessons;
however
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, some
people
Use synonyms
 are not intelligent in everything, but in certain
things
Use synonyms
, they are unstoppable. The first reason to support
this
Linking Words
 view is that some
people
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 reach their
intelligence
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 by passing through a
lot
Use synonyms
 of problems and lessons. And
that is
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 why, when you
passing
Wrong verb form
pass
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 through a
lot
Use synonyms
 of obstacles, they remember what the problem was at that time, and after that, they think
how
Change preposition
about how
show examples
 not
making
Wrong verb form
to make
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 the same mistake once again. They think a
lot
Use synonyms
, and because of it, they develop a
lot
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 of knowledge.
Moreover
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, you can reach your
intelligence
Use synonyms
 can be reached by teaching and studying a
lot
Use synonyms
 in school or university, but nowadays these institutions
does
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
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 not prepare
intelligence
Use synonyms
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
future life.
For example
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, when I was young, I sold Apple devices, but without knowing how to sell, I lost a
lot
Use synonyms
 of money. After brainstorming what I should do, I developed my
intelligence
Use synonyms
 on how to sell better. The second reason that I want to support is that there are
people
Use synonyms
 who are not intelligent in everything, but in certain
things
Use synonyms
, they are unstoppable. A
lot
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 of
people
Use synonyms
 find their path by nowhere. It is You do not need
necessary
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
to be intelligent in everything; all you should do is find your own way
of
Change preposition
to
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intelligence
Use synonyms
.
For example
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, Bill Gates, even though he
was not n’t
Rephrase
wasn’t
show examples
 the best in school or university,
look
Correct subject-verb agreement
looks
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 now,
it
Correct pronoun usage
he
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 has the most expensive company in the world.
To sum up
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, being intelligent is good, but not every time your
intelligence
Use synonyms
 can help you in the most difficult situations.
Besides
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this
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, you need to have in your arsenal
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
things
Use synonyms
:
Punctuation problem
:
show examples
 team spirit, persuasiveness, and so on.
This
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 is the
intelligence
Use synonyms
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 not the
things
Use synonyms
 you learn at school.

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task
Your view is not clear in the opening. State your clear opinion in the first line and restate it at the end.
coherence
Organize ideas in order. Use one idea in each paragraph and add simple links like 'also', 'but', 'for example', 'in conclusion'.
language
Check the grammar and spell mistakes. Fix phrases like 'not n’t' and 'you passing'.
content
Two clear examples are used to support points (a sales job and Bill Gates).
structure
There is a plan to discuss both sides before giving a view.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • measure
  • intelligence
  • success
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving
  • adaptability
  • emotional intelligence
  • creativity
  • practical skills
  • standardized testing
  • academic performance
  • capabilities
  • potential
  • privilege
  • correlate
  • hard work
What to do next:
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