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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

University students are increasingly studying abroad as a part of thier studies.do the advantages of studying abroad outweigh the disadvantages?

#university #students #part #thier #studies
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Throughout the world students from local educational institutions highly prefer to study in foreign countries as a part of their learning journey.
Although
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 there are several drawbacks personally, I think the benefits of
this
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 choice will be more significant. On the one hand, being abroad comes with challenges. Every person who studied in another country can claim that it did not go without a few difficulties. There are common challenges
such
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 as cultural shock, another level of study system and a lot of new information to take in which makes the student stressed and overwhelmed.
Furthermore
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, at
such
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 a young age people often fail to cope with various hard tasks and take care of themselves.
For example
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, one of my friends went through a harsh situation
while
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 studying abroad. In his first year of education, he could not find an apartment to live in and was forced to spend a week at the bus station.
On the other hand
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, getting high-quality knowledge from foreign government universities might be a huge advantage for student's future careers. Most academies in developed countries are at the top of the 1000 greatest education places in the world. Learners from these universities would definitely take
Add an article
the
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knowledge that gives them an advantage in competition in their future careers.
For instance
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, our government's Minister of Education is the person who studied in Germany. Her ability and skills brought literacy to another level in my country.
To conclude
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, despite the fact that it might add additional burden to students who study abroad, possible future prospects seem like it is worth doing.
Submitted by Teo Halimov on

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Language Use
Try to include a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas even more effectively. This will help your essay stand out and demonstrate a higher level of language proficiency.
Task Response
In your conclusion, restate your opinion more clearly to reinforce your argument. This ensures the reader is left with a strong impression of your stance.
Coherence & Cohesion
Consider introducing your paragraphs with clearer topic sentences. This helps the reader immediately understand the main idea of each paragraph.
Structure
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which aids in readability.
Example Usage
You provided concrete examples to support your points, which strengthens your argument significantly.
Critical Thinking
Your balanced consideration of advantages and disadvantages before concluding shows good critical thinking skills.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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