In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Increasing numbers of young people are opting for work-based training over tertiary
education
in some nations. This
trend is driven by factors such
as early financial independence and greater freedom. However
, while
there are advantages to this
decision, the disadvantages outweigh them.
Undoubtedly, entering the workforce early enables individuals to achieve financial independence and experience a sense of freedom. Unlike university students who face numerous deadlines, stressful exam periods, and the challenge of balancing studies with part-time jobs, those in work-based training have the advantage of avoiding these stressors and enjoying more leisure time for personal pursuits, such
as traveling
.
Change the spelling
travelling
Nevertheless
, enrolling in work-based training at a young age often only provides short-term benefits. Individuals with lower educational qualifications tend to have limited job options. High-paying jobs typically require a strong educational background. Therefore
, tertiary degrees or higher qualifications not only increase job opportunities but also
provide better career pathways and lead to a more satisfying quality of life. For instance
, professions such
as doctors, lawyers, and engineers, which are highly skilled and highly paid, require a robust educational foundation and offer high social status.
In conclusion, while
starting work at an early stage may offer immediate benefits like financial independence and freedom, young people should consider the long-term advantages and invest their time in university education
for a brighter future. By pursuing higher education
, individuals open up a broader range of career opportunities and enhance their earning potential. Therefore
, the disadvantages of forgoing tertiary education
outweigh the short-term advantages of work-based training.Submitted by nataliewong313 on
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Task Achievement
To enhance your essay further, consider including more diverse and detailed examples to support your arguments. This can enrich your argumentation and make your essay more persuasive.
Task Achievement
It's beneficial to explore the disadvantages in the same depth as the advantages to maintain a balanced discussion and fully address the question. This approach will also strengthen your argumentation and make your essay more compelling.
Coherence & Cohesion
For improved coherence, consider varying your sentence structures and using a wider range of linking words to smoothly connect ideas.
Task Achievement
Your essay successfully discusses both advantages and disadvantages, providing a clear overall opinion, which is good for task response.
Coherence & Cohesion
The logical structure of your essay, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, effectively guides the reader through your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.