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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie charts show the revenue sources and expenditures of a children’s charity in the USA in one year. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The pie charts show the revenue sources and expenditures of a children’s charity in the USA in one year. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
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The two pie charts illustrate the statistics on
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 annual income sources and
spendings
Fix the agreement mistake
spending
show examples
 of a USA charity for children.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that a substantial proportion of the revenue comes from donated food,
whereas
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 children’s charity allocates a significant amount of money on programmes
services
Correct word choice
and services
show examples
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the largest proportion of the earnings
come
Correct subject-verb agreement
comes
show examples
 from donated food, contributing well over 85%.
This
Linking Words
 is followed closely by community contributions which is eight times less than the former.
While
Linking Words
 programmed revenue accounts for 2%, the three remaining sources make up less than 0.5%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 American children’s charity utilises almost all of its money on program services, at about 95% of the expenditures. Fundraising and Management and general together make up less than 5%.
However
Linking Words
, compared to the total of the revenue sources, the total of the expenditures is lower, roughly 200,000 dollars.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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