IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The maps show the changes that happened to an island called Paradise

The maps show the changes that happened to an island called Paradise
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There are two maps which are named ‘Before’ and ‘After’ illustrate the changes
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 Paradise
Island
Use synonyms
 to provide
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
tourists
some
Change preposition
with some
show examples
 recreational areas.
Overall
Linking Words
, the dramatic changes in
new
Add an article
a new
the new
show examples
 map of
Use synonyms
Island
Correct article usage
the Island
show examples
 like building some places to
absorb
Verb problem
encourage
show examples
 people to come
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
there. Obviously, in the past, there
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
were no
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
buildings
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 Paradise
Island
Use synonyms
.There were just some trees in
northern
Correct article usage
the northern
show examples
 and southern parts of
Use synonyms
Island
Correct article usage
the Island
show examples
 and no facilities to access
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
there. In
new
Add an article
the new
show examples
 map, it can be seen that many
accomadations
Correct your spelling
accommodations
 were constructed for tourists to take a rest there.A
repection
Correct your spelling
reception
 building .All of
places
Add an article
the places
show examples
 were connected
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 footpaths.Just
pier
Correct article usage
the pier
show examples
,reception and restaurant
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
were linked with vehicle tracks.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Add more linking words.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words island with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: