Prison is the common way in most countries to solve the problem of crime. However, a more effective solution is to provide people a better education. Do you agree or disagree?
In many countries the most common practice to prevent crime is imprisonment.
Nevertheless
, a better way to solve the issue is a good study system. I fully agree with the latter idea, because education creates public awareness among the individuals and reduces poverty and unemployment.
Schooling is the most efficient way to protect the society from wrongdoings. The reason for Linking Words
this
is teaching kids at school about law, rules, ethics, and moral values makes them sensitive adults and creates a safer environment for the community. More sensitive adults towards morals make a better societal composition. Linking Words
For instance
, the crime rate in Norway is the closest to zero among its neighbours; Linking Words
however
, the amount of prisons in the country is one of the fewest compared to the others considering its population.
Another reason for the circumstance is the benefit of discipline to the socio-economic structure of a nation. The main causes of crimes are poverty, unemployment, ignorance and lack of opportunities. Learning helps youngsters gain a deeper understanding of their profession and the skills that are required for them to benefit from higher employability. Linking Words
Thus
, tuition is the most important factor in reducing unemployment and poverty. Linking Words
In particular
, it is observed in the statistical data that crime rates in impoverished countries are higher than in those with better cultures.
In conclusion, tutoring the people of a country about law and ethics provides security and supports the well-being of that nation. Linking Words
This
is why, I completely agree with the statement that literacy is the best way to solve the problems related to misbehaviour rather than prisons.Linking Words
Submitted by musayevjahangir on
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Task Achievement
To improve Task Achievement, ensure that examples given are specific and directly related to the topic to support your argument more effectively.
Task Achievement
To enhance the effectiveness of examples, linking them back to the thesis statement directly can make your argument more powerful.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a strong logical structure, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Main points are well-supported with reasons and generalized examples, showing good coherence.
Task Achievement
You effectively communicate a comprehensive perspective on the topic, showing a strong understanding and clear/expressive idea presentation.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite