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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think it is the government's responsibility to pay for the health care and education for their people, while other believe it is not the government's responsibility. Discuss both views and write your opinion.

#people #government #responsibility #health #care #education
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Some
people
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 contend that it is the
government
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's authority to financially
support
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people
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's health concerns and
education
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, whilst others argue that it is rather an individual's duty. I personally align with the former opinion as I believe it is the authority's burden to provide basic needs and protection for their
people
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 who cannot specifically protect themselves. On the one hand, some argue that the
government
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 should not bear the sole burden of funding healthcare and
education
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due to
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 pressing global priorities. They contend that diverting resources to cover these expenses could strain the
government
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's finances, impeding its ability to address critical infrastructure projects and maintain diplomatic relations.
This
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 perspective highlights the multifaceted responsibilities governments face, suggesting that expecting them to cover healthcare and
education
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 costs may be impractical.
On the other hand
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, proponents of
government
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support
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 argue that it is essential for ensuring the well-being of all citizens. They assert that financial assistance for vulnerable groups,
such
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 as the elderly or disabled, is crucial as they may struggle to secure employment.
For example
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, without adequate
support
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, these individuals may resort to illegal means of survival, posing a threat to the country's economic stability. For these reasons, they advocate for
government
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 intervention to safeguard
people
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's health and educational needs. In conclusion,
while
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 funding healthcare and
education
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 may pose financial challenges for governments, I believe that it is their responsibility to prioritize the basic needs of their citizens. By providing
support
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 in these areas, governments can ensure the
overall
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 welfare and prosperity of society.
Submitted by chloepark990526 on

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Examples and Evidence
To enhance the quality of your essay and reach even higher scores, consider including more specific examples and evidence to back up your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and provide a stronger foundation for your viewpoints.
Sentence Structure
Continuing to practice varying your sentence structures can add complexity and sophistication to your writing. Using a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences effectively can improve the overall readability and coherence of your essays.
Task Response
Your essay effectively discusses both viewpoints on the issue, providing a comprehensive exploration of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have structured your essay logically, with clear progression from introduction, through the body, to the conclusion. This demonstrates strong coherence and cohesion skills.
Personal Opinion
The use of a distinct personal opinion enriches your essay, providing a clear stance that enhances task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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