Some people think that watching sports in one's free time is just waste of time. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #sports #time #waste

There is a prevalent belief that spending leisure

time

watching

sports

is a waste of one's

time

However

, I contend that

such

a perspective overlooks the numerous benefits that

sports

viewing offers, including stress reduction and social engagement.

Firstly

sports

spectating serves as an effective

stress-reliever

Correct your spelling

stress reliever

show examples

. The emotional rollercoaster experienced

while

watching

sports

matches provides an avenue for individuals to unwind and escape the pressures of daily life.

For instance

, the unpredictability of basketball games, with their myriad twists and turns, can engross spectators, momentarily alleviating their anxiety and contributing to improved mental well-being.

Moreover

sports

serve as a catalyst for social interaction, fostering connections among individuals from diverse backgrounds. Sporting events act as communal gatherings where people unite to support their

favorite

Change the spelling

favourite

show examples

teams, transcending cultural and national boundaries. These gatherings provide opportunities for strangers to bond over shared passions, thereby cultivating new friendships.

For example

, the global phenomenon of the World Cup draws millions of fans together, offering a platform for cultural exchange and solidarity on an international scale. In conclusion, the notion that watching

sports

in one's free

time

is a waste fails to acknowledge the intrinsic value of

this

activity. By offering stress relief and fostering social connections,

sports

viewing enriches individuals' lives in meaningful ways.

Therefore

, I vehemently oppose the assertion that indulging in

sports

spectating constitutes an unproductive use of

time

Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on Mon May 13 2024

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coherence cohesion

Introduce more varied linking words to enhance the logical flow of ideas.

task achievement

Provide more detailed examples to strengthen your arguments.

task achievement

Effective introduction and conclusion that clearly state your position.

task achievement

Good use of examples to support main points, such as the unpredictability of basketball games and the World Cup.

coherence cohesion

Well-structured paragraphs with clear topic sentences that contribute to the essay's coherence.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

226 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

communal unity
stress relief
economic impact
sedentary lifestyle
emotional investment
teamwork
discipline
healthier lifestyle
fantasy sports
interactive experience
leisure activities
personal development

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