Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

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It is argued that

music

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creates a strong bond between diverse generations and customs. I strongly disagree with

this

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idea as new generations and other generations have different tastes regarding

music

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and

also

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different

cultures

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don't have the same values. These days, the new generation prefers to listen to the latest types of

music

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and they don't have any interest in the 1960s and 1970s ones and find them old-fashioned which are the

favorite

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favourite

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songs

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of their parents and older people. youngsters, usually enjoy listening to young pop stars'

music

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whose

songs

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are about love stories or heartbroken.

Such

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as Selena Gomez and Taylor Swift. By way of example, when families are on a car journey normally conflict

due to

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every member of the family

want

Wrong verb form

wanting

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to listen

such

Linking Words

songs

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that are not enjoyable for others.

In addition

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, despite

music

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has rejuvenated all of us with a variety of ages and

cultures

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that said, it can't connect

cultures

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together.

Cultures

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do not have the same values and literature. So, they may consider some other

cultures

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' poets inadequate.

For instance

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, in the song Who Do You Love by the Maroon Five, the lyric contains the line 'You are moving differently when we are making life'.

While

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those from traditional

cultures

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may regard the lyrics as disgraceful, westerners find it lovely.

Thus

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, the

songs

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make them become disrespectful of each other's

cultures

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potentially. In conclusion, I do not think traditions and ages can be liked by the

music

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industry. Because individuals have grown up with different attitudes and environments have influenced their thoughts.

Moreover

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, youths tend to keep up with the latest

music

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, unlike their parents.

Submitted by kmibehnaz98 on Sun Dec 31 2023

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coherence cohesion

Try to present a clearly structured argument that flows logically from one point to the next. While your introduction and conclusion are present, they could be strengthened by more explicitly acknowledging contrasting viewpoints and harmonizing your overall argument.

task achievement

Develop your ideas further and provide more in-depth analysis of how music may or may not bring people together. Be sure to fully address the topic throughout your essay. Your response should more directly and explicitly discuss the degree to which you agree or disagree with the opinion stated in the prompt.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

274 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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