Some people think technology development decrease crime, while others believe it actually encourage crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #technology #development #decrease #crime

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One of the most prevalent trends in the contemporary world is the cumulative increase in crime-preventive innovations. Many people argue that technologies promote crimes,

while

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others believe that they reduce the crime ratio in society. Both sides of

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notion will be carefully analysed before constructing an inference and I will give my opinion. On the one hand, artificial intelligence and central databases. The main reason is that with the help of algorithm information provided by artificial intelligence,

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system provides solutions within a short period of time.

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, recently in New Delhi- India, a murder mystery was solved with the help of technology, even the person was dead and the police reached the criminal because the programme caught the criminal’s face and spread all over the country. Another factor is that nowadays countries have their own central database, including fingerprints and the criminal history of criminals, if any incident happens police reach criminals' places and trace them easily.

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, police can trace the mobile locations of any suspected person.

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, it is evident that technology always helps to understand medical science and engineering subjects.

On the other hand

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, there is no doubt new inventions sometimes become dangerous for human beings. Claver criminals go to the dark web servers and learn new ideas to harm innocent adults. Sometimes bad people make videos to blackmail celebrities and demand money.

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, some sites provide guidance, on how to make weapons and teens learn from these websites and enter into the crime world.

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, some militants throw bombs on crowds and kill them, ISIS is making weapons and blasts on crowded buildings.

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, it is apparent why technologies are harmful for generations. In my opinion, new inventions always contribute to preventing crimes if they are used for good motives and domain operators should ban violent sites, so everyone can enjoy

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beautiful earth peacefully. In conclusion, following the analysis of both sides, it is clear new research brings new thoughts to the regime,

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, we need to check on wrong inventions.

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, it is predicted that the Government should be vigilant about their people’s activities, so they can not access new technologies and motivate new startups for the state's growth.

Submitted by rbtech65 on Tue May 14 2024

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Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that encapsulates the main idea. Also, aim for smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs. Using connecting words and phrases can help with this.

Task Achievement

Strengthen the examples and ensure they are directly related to the main points. Clarify complex ideas for better understanding and make sure that each paragraph addresses a distinct point related to the essay question.

Coherence & Cohesion

Avoid repetition of words and phrases to maintain variety and keep the reader engaged. Additionally, make sure that each supporting point logically ties back to your main argument or idea.

Task Achievement

Include more specific evidence and examples that align closely with the points being made. Ensure that all parts of the essay prompt are addressed equally, giving a balanced view.

Task Achievement

The essay addresses both views on the topic clearly and provides an opinion, which is essential for this task type.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames the discussion well.

Task Achievement

Relevant examples are used to support points, which adds credibility to the arguments presented.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

374 words

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Some people think technology development decrease crime, while others believe it actually encourage crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The below gives information about rail transport in four counties in 2007

do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweight the disadvantages?

Most have forgotten the meanig behind traditional or religious festivals. During festival periods people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Many people around the world use social media every day to keep in touch with others people and get new events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing, and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. what do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?