The problem of homelessness is on the rise in several significant urban centers globally. What is the main cause of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it by communities and governments?
Nowadays the slum areas are being soared
day
by day
which depicts the increment of displaced people
in numerous nations. The main cause of this
is a high rate of illiteracy and to the extent that government
should take involvement to solve this
by improving infrastructure and launching a welfare
scheme.
homeless is mainly caused by the high rate of illiteracy, from beginning of the journey of poor people
start with begging, this
is because they are influenced by their parents
and follow up what they do; for example
, if their parents
are beggar then
their son will also
become a beggar, but in today's era, a human being can not survive by begging, the reason why many parents
are influencing their children to study. Studying in governemnt school is way much harder because of poor infrastructure.
In addition
, several students are hoping to get well educated but because the government
is not showing any interest in education like improving schools, or appointing well-educated teachers. If poor people
have to be educated then
the government
has to show some interest so that after getting educated they can get a well-off day
and settle themself and their parents
. Lastly
, our state should announce welfare
scheme so that before getting the job they should have support for their survival. For example
, in welfare
scheme, government
will help poor people
by paying off their salary which they deserve.
In conclusion, Although
the number of homeless people
is increasing day
by day
, the government
can help these civilians by providing welfare
schemes and improving infrastructureSubmitted by tushalk329
on
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task response
The essay addresses the key aspects of the task, identifying the high rate of illiteracy as a primary cause of homelessness and suggesting government intervention as a solution. However, it would benefit from a broader exploration of causes and solutions, incorporating multiple perspectives to present a more comprehensive analysis.
coherence cohesion
The essay is generally coherent and cohesive, with a logical flow of ideas. However, minor issues in sentence structure and grammar, such as "homeless" instead of "homelessness" and "beggar" should be "beggars," detract from the overall clarity. Work on refining these elements to enhance readability.
coherence cohesion
Paragraph structure could be improved. For example, the first body paragraph could be split into two - one focusing on the influence of parents on children’s education and another on the challenges in government schools. This will help in presenting clear, well-defined ideas.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame the discussion. This shows an understanding of the structure needed for an IELTS essay.
task response
The use of examples, such as the influence of parents on children’s education, adds depth and specificity to the arguments, making them more persuasive.
task response
The essay's focus on government intervention and welfare schemes demonstrates a thoughtful approach to solving the problem, addressing both immediate and long-term needs of homeless individuals.