Some people see sports only as a leisure activity, while others believe sports play a more important role. Discuss both views and give your option.

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Whilst many think that playing
sports
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is just a source of entertainment, I believe that participation in different
sports
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has many benefits because
games
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help a person to stay physically and mentally healthy, and
sports
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also
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increase competitive
spirit
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among individuals.
To begin
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with the former argument,
people
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view various
games
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and
sports
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as an activity of fun. Playing
sports
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gives a sense of relaxation to many individuals. Many
people
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in the morning or evening visit
sports
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grounds to fill up their free time. It is an inevitable fact that
sports
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are a great source of entertainment, fun, and stress burster, and
people
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play them in order to break the everyday monotony of life,
for example
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, in many organisations there are annual
sports
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competitions in order to make sure that the employees stay stress-free, as
sports
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is considered as the best source of recreation.
On the contrary
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, I believe that with
games
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,
people
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not only get entertained but
also
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stay fit both physically and mentally. The first and foremost factor to support my point is that, with participation regularly in various sporting activities, a person does
natural
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the natural
show examples
physical exercise of their whole body.
Moreover
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, some
games
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enhance the cognitive abilities of humans,
for example
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, chess.
Besides
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this
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,
sports
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increase the
spirit
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of competition in players,
for example
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, teams play against each other in order to win, and
this
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winning
spirit
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assists them later in their lives as well.
Also
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, playing distinct
games
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promotes team
spirit
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as well. In conclusion,
although
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without a doubt
games
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and
sports
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are the best way to stay entertained, I still support the latter argument that with
sports
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,
people
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are able to develop holistically as
games
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aid
people
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to stay healthy;
moreover
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, they promote teamwork and competitive
spirit
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among players.

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task achievement
Your essay effectively discusses both views and presents a well-defined opinion. However, ensure all your examples are clearly supporting your main points. For example, mentioning cognitive abilities could be paired with a specific example of a sport.
coherence cohesion
While your ideas are clearly presented, try to link your paragraphs more fluidly. Use transition phrases or sentences to make the progression between points smoother.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction sets up the topic well and presents both views clearly. It immediately provides a well-defined thesis statement.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reaffirms your opinion, which ties the essay together nicely.
task achievement
You've provided a balanced discussion of both views, which shows a thorough understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • leisure activity
  • relaxation
  • unwind
  • socialize
  • non-essential
  • recreational
  • physical health
  • fitness
  • life skills
  • teamwork
  • discipline
  • community pride
  • national pride
  • career opportunities
  • personal development
  • societal well-being
  • balanced view
  • acknowledge
  • benefits
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