Many people buy unnecessary things and get into debt when they do not need them. why people who buy extra things are getting into debt and discuss possible solutions.

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In today's digital age, there is a common

issue

Use synonyms

of wasting on tools that we do not actually need . The growing quantity of advertisements and billboards forces people to buy extra items.

However

Linking Words

, fortunately, there are several ways how to counter

this

Linking Words

issue

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

, let's talk about the

individuals

Use synonyms

who get

extra

Add an article

the extra

show examples

debt to purchase

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

unrellevant

Correct your spelling

relevant

objects.

Change preposition

With

show examples

the growing popularity of credit cards and bank accounts ,

individuals

Use synonyms

got into

this

Linking Words

digital world quickly .Unfortunately, there is a frequent problem that , expenditure done with credit cards seems to

individuals

Use synonyms

non-real waste and they are not enable to control themselves from them .

Moreover

Linking Words

, there is evidence that advertisements have become ubiquitous.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, there is a fact of children who pester their parents for the objects that they see when watching TV . The host of the house , compelled to purchase the expenditures faces bad circumstances.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, the

issue

Use synonyms

is worldwide , certainly , there are a number of ways how to escape from

this

Linking Words

matrix. An ordinary counterattack is to wait the

first

Use synonyms

24 hours before obtaining an expensive device.

According to

Linking Words

British researchers , exploration made in Ireland displayed demographic information that

individuals

Use synonyms

make silly mistakes in the

first

Use synonyms

24 hours . The eagerness to the tool increases each hour and charms the

individuals

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Thus

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, delaying the

first

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day is crucial for humans , as there is a period of consideration .

To conclude

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, there is an ordinary worldwide problem of purchasing unnecessary stuff .

However

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, there are several ways to escape from

this

Linking Words

issue

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. By killing time

first

Use synonyms

24 hours

individuals

Use synonyms

make a decision and eventually consider the item's necessity .

Submitted by nejla.abdullayeva on Thu May 16 2024

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task achievement

The essay addresses the task and presents ideas on why people get into debt buying unnecessary things and possible solutions. However, the arguments need more development and specific examples to enhance the discussion.

task achievement

Ensure that points are more evenly supported by specific facts, studies, or real-life examples. This will make your arguments more persuasive and credible.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a logical structure and is easy to follow. However, there are jumps between ideas that could be smoothed out to enhance the flow of the essay.

coherence cohesion

Use complete sentences and transition words to connect your arguments more seamlessly. For example, use words like 'moreover', 'furthermore', 'consequently' to show the relationship between sentences and paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

The ideas presented are clear, but the vocabulary and sentence structures could be varied to avoid repetition and improve readability.

task achievement

Introduce more specific details and clear examples to substantiate your points, such as studies, surveys, or personal anecdotes. This will help in making your arguments more tangible and persuasive.

coherence cohesion

You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which is essential for a well-structured essay.

task achievement

The essay addresses both parts of the task: reasons for getting into debt and possible solutions.

coherence cohesion

You have a logical flow in your argument, which makes the essay easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

283 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Consumer culture
Impulsive purchases
Financial literacy
Retail therapy
Sustainable living
Minimalism
Psychological tricks
Credit facilities
Debt cycle
Budgeting tools

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Many people buy unnecessary things and get into debt when they do not need them. why people who buy extra things are getting into debt and discuss possible solutions.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think government should ban dangerous sports; others, however, believe that people should be free to do whatever they choose. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the last decade, there has been a great increase in international travel. What do you think are the reasons for this and do you think it is a good thing?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think is a positive or a negative development?

Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. Other say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. Disucss both these view and give your own opinions.