These days many people prefer online shopping to conventional shopping. Do the advantages of online shopping outweigh the disadvatages?

#people #disadvatages

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Some people today choose to do online shopping rather than

old way

Add a hyphen

old-way

show examples

shopping because more

benefit

Fix the agreement mistake

benefits

show examples

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

been offered than

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

disadvantages. In my opinion, online shopping

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

several benefits and

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

disadvantages.

This

Linking Words

leads to more society

has

Verb problem

being

show examples

influenced to do online shopping more than the conventional one.

Firstly

Linking Words

, some advantages

from

Change preposition

show examples

online shopping are convenient and cheap.

For example

Linking Words

, people can buy anything they want from online shopping

application

Fix the agreement mistake

applications

show examples

and the things they

ordered

Wrong verb form

order

show examples

will

be send

Change the verb form

be sent

show examples

in next day or faster. Buying something today just

required

Wrong verb form

requires

show examples

minimum effort to do without going to

store

Correct article usage

a store

show examples

with public or private transportation that will cost money. Everyone can order

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their

Change the word

the

show examples

gadget that they already have in their hand

such

Linking Words

as phones,

tablet

Fix the agreement mistake

tablets

show examples

, computers, and others.

This

Linking Words

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

it online shopping more convenient than the usual shopping. Another example is many online shopping store has a lot of

discount

Change to a plural noun

discounts

show examples

to attract consumers to buy their

products

Use synonyms

Consequently

Linking Words

products

Use synonyms

from online shopping

Correct your spelling

are

show examples

cheaper than the regular shops and people absolutely choose the cheaper

products

Use synonyms

In contrast

Linking Words

, online shopping

also

Linking Words

has disadvantages

such

Linking Words

products

Use synonyms

that

not

Add a missing verb

are not

show examples

as good as we expected and shipping

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

that will cause damage to the product. To illustrate, sometimes the arrived product is different from the catalogue product that

Add a missing verb

is more

show examples

edited than the real ones. The other thing is online shopping

products

Use synonyms

have some risk

to became

Change preposition

of becoming

show examples

damage

Wrong verb form

damaged

show examples

because

the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

time of shipping

processs

Correct your spelling

process

in order to arrive in our home.

To conclude

Linking Words

, Online shopping has offered some good

offer

Fix the agreement mistake

offers

show examples

such

Linking Words

as more convenient and cheaper.

However

Linking Words

, online shopping

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

bad

sonsequences

Correct your spelling

consequences

such

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

unexpected

products

Use synonyms

and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

damage

Replace the word

damaged

show examples

products

Use synonyms

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Fri May 17 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

To improve task response, aim to address the prompt more directly. Discuss in more detail the balance of advantages and disadvantages to strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Improve coherence and cohesion by using more linking phrases and words to connect your ideas more smoothly. This will make your essay easier to follow for the reader.

task achievement

Enhance your essay by providing more specific examples and details to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and robust.

coherence cohesion

Pay attention to grammar and word choice to ensure clarity. Avoid repetitive phrases and seek to vary your vocabulary.

task achievement

Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and you provide relevant points regarding both advantages and disadvantages of online shopping.

coherence cohesion

You have structured your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in presenting your ideas systematically.

task achievement

The examples you provided, such as the convenience of having products delivered and the potential risks involved, are relevant and help illustrate your points.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

276 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Undeniably, with the development of science and technology, our planet is being polluted by the green house gas or chemicals released by human beings, and such a fact leads impressionable people to generate the opinion that the vitalest target of science should not be to improve people's lives. However, such a statement suffers from both logical and factual fallacies, and it should be examined particularly. As far as efficiency, equality and environment are concerned, I strongly hold that the most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives.
7.5
band
In many cities the population is increasing. Some say that the urbanization process denies us knowing our neighbors, and this causes a loss of community sense. What is the main problem with this? What measures can be taken to overcome it?
Urban migration has been a burning topic , especially in this contemporary world today that has left many families and societies shuttered. The causes of this phenomenon are due to several reasons that will be discussed in this essay and also the measures that government officials can take to reduce their effect on the nation.
7
band
On a recent holiday you lost a valuable item. Fortunately, you have travel insurance to cover the cost of anything lost. Write a letter to the manager of your insurance company. In your letter describe the item you lost explain how you lost it tell the insurance company what you would like them to do
I am writing to inform you in order to get help from your agency. Last Friday 2024/05/03 there was a Harry Potter event in the lobby of my hotel in which I lost a chair.
4.5
band
Some people think that robots are very important to human's future development, while others think that they are dangerous and have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In today's society, globalization has shifted our movement and unite individuals' activities. this is development because of the wide of network and internet. especially supported by robots, and this is the form of changemaker through Artificial intelligence and Science. However, an invention through technology might have an impact on some individuals and the environment. This essay will talk about the upsides and downsides of artificial intelligence for human.
4.5
band
In many countries, people are now living longer than before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for government. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extend do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages
In recent years, a lot of individuals prefer live more longer. In my mind, all people willing to live a lot. Moreover, old people becoming more and more. Although, youngs and children also being a little. Furthermore, there are some children and teenagers and they are not more than adults. It is one example to these issues.

These days many people prefer online shopping to conventional shopping. Do the advantages of online shopping outweigh the disadvatages?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In many cities the population is increasing. Some say that the urbanization process denies us knowing our neighbors, and this causes a loss of community sense. What is the main problem with this? What measures can be taken to overcome it?

Some people think that robots are very important to human's future development, while others think that they are dangerous and have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries, people are now living longer than before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for government. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extend do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages