These days many people prefer online shopping to conventional shopping. Do the advantages of online shopping outweigh the disadvatages?

#people #disadvatages

Some people today choose to do online shopping rather than

old way

Add a hyphen

old-way

show examples

shopping because more

benefit

Fix the agreement mistake

benefits

show examples

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

been offered than

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

disadvantages. In my opinion, online shopping

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

several benefits and

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

disadvantages.

This

leads to more society

has

Verb problem

being

show examples

influenced to do online shopping more than the conventional one.

Firstly

, some advantages

from

Change preposition

show examples

online shopping are convenient and cheap.

For example

, people can buy anything they want from online shopping

application

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applications

show examples

and the things they

ordered

Wrong verb form

order

show examples

will

be send

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be sent

show examples

in next day or faster. Buying something today just

required

Wrong verb form

requires

show examples

minimum effort to do without going to

store

Correct article usage

a store

show examples

with public or private transportation that will cost money. Everyone can order

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their

Change the word

the

show examples

gadget that they already have in their hand

such

as phones,

tablet

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tablets

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, computers, and others.

This

make

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makes

show examples

it online shopping more convenient than the usual shopping. Another example is many online shopping store has a lot of

discount

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discounts

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to attract consumers to buy their

products

Consequently

products

from online shopping

Correct your spelling

are

show examples

cheaper than the regular shops and people absolutely choose the cheaper

products

In contrast

, online shopping

also

has disadvantages

such

products

that

not

Add a missing verb

are not

show examples

as good as we expected and shipping

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

that will cause damage to the product. To illustrate, sometimes the arrived product is different from the catalogue product that

Add a missing verb

is more

show examples

edited than the real ones. The other thing is online shopping

products

have some risk

to became

Change preposition

of becoming

show examples

damage

Wrong verb form

damaged

show examples

because

the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

time of shipping

processs

Correct your spelling

process

in order to arrive in our home.

To conclude

, Online shopping has offered some good

offer

Fix the agreement mistake

offers

show examples

such

as more convenient and cheaper.

However

, online shopping

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

bad

sonsequences

Correct your spelling

consequences

such

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

unexpected

products

and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

damage

Replace the word

damaged

show examples

products

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Fri May 17 2024

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task achievement

To improve task response, aim to address the prompt more directly. Discuss in more detail the balance of advantages and disadvantages to strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Improve coherence and cohesion by using more linking phrases and words to connect your ideas more smoothly. This will make your essay easier to follow for the reader.

task achievement

Enhance your essay by providing more specific examples and details to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and robust.

coherence cohesion

Pay attention to grammar and word choice to ensure clarity. Avoid repetitive phrases and seek to vary your vocabulary.

task achievement

Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and you provide relevant points regarding both advantages and disadvantages of online shopping.

coherence cohesion

You have structured your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in presenting your ideas systematically.

task achievement

The examples you provided, such as the convenience of having products delivered and the potential risks involved, are relevant and help illustrate your points.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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These days many people prefer online shopping to conventional shopping. Do the advantages of online shopping outweigh the disadvatages?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Because of the covid epidemic, many people prefer to work or study from home instead of going to their workplace or university

People in many countries are spending less time with their families. What are the reasons and effect of this?

It is better for college students to live far away from home than live at home with their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some experts think that universal basic income only makes sense if it provides just enough to survive on so that people still need to work and earn money for living. To what extent do you agree?

Some people say that the Internet is making the world smaller by bringing people together. To what extent do you agree that the internet is making it easier for people to communicate with one another?