Some people think that certain old buildings are more worth preserving than other ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, many people strongly believe that the preservation of several old

buildings

needs to pay more attention than others. From my point of view, I totally agree with

this

phenomenon;

hence

, I will explain my view in the following essay. It is obvious that many old properties can express the value of a country’s culture.

Firstly

, old

buildings

being historical ruins expose the challenges and difficulties of our ancestors in fighting during the wars.

Therefore

, they are apparent evidence of the victory in many countries.

Secondly

, ancient

buildings

are critical of many damaging actions and remind descendant about covering their country simultaneously. Because of the profound dedication of pre-generation, people are responsible for keeping the value of

this

architecture as their symbol.

Furthermore

, preserving old property is a good way to show respect to their societies in some cases. Concerning the former, they are special achievements of ancestors that citizens of each country need to be grateful for. Several ancient structures are the pride of an area.

Due to

lots of efforts in the past, the young generation should protect traditions and perceptions which were maintained by ancestors. To cite an instance, in Vietnam, people especially teenagers, are fostered thein awareness of the valuable heritage.

Thus

, they know the way how to introduce and expand their culture to others around the world.

Moreover

, it can enhance the interaction and relationship between different societies. In conclusion, reserving old

buildings

gives many benefits to countries

such

as exposing the value of culture, the respect of descendants and offering many better cooperations in the future. I claim that hesitates deserves much attention from

this

area.

Sun May 19 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, try to ensure your ideas connect more smoothly. Using linking words and phrases more effectively can help with this.

task achievement

Your task achievement is good, but ensuring that examples are more specific and clearly relevant to your points could strengthen it further.

coherence cohesion

Some sentences can be rephrased for clarity and better comprehension. Focus on structuring sentences more clearly to express your ideas.

coherence cohesion

You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which gives a good structure to your essay.

task achievement

You have made an effort to provide relevant arguments and examples to support your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

272 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that certain old buildings are more worth preserving than other ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

More and more people are opting for readymade ford intead of freshly home cooked food. Discuss advantageous and disadvantages?

Some people say that now we can see the films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. Others say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in cinema. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

in today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages ?

The cost of flying has decreased significantly over the last decades. This has made oversea travel much more accessible. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend.