It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
In the current world, various issues are subject to debate. One of the issues is taking
risks
, not only in the professional but also
in our personal lives. While
taking risks
has advantages and disadvantages
, the benefits
far outweigh the drawbacks. The following paragraphs will examine the numerous benefits
of taking risks
and why they are more important than the downsides.
Firstly
, one important thing about taking risks
is that it will open up so many chances and possibilities. This
relates to the fact that a state of readiness to face the risks
can lead to the possibility of success. For example
, there is a renowned idiom that says 'high risk, high return'. This
principle is widely used in the stock market. This
concept tells us that if we want to gain a higher return on investment, we have to take a higher risk. Moreover
, taking risks
also
allows us to gain better knowledge about something. This
means that if we are brave enough to do something no matter what we will face after that, we will get lessons from that condition
, regardless of whether it is good or bad. For instance
, my brother was taking the risk of losing his monthly salary at a top-tier company in order to switch careers and pursue his dream of being a travel vlogger. He bet everything he had and started living his dream. He struggled in the beginning, but slowly managed the situation. That decision made him realize that, although
chasing a dream demanded a painful sacrifice, it was something worth doing.
Despite its benefits
, taking risks
has some drawbacks. One notable downside is that it can lead to unbearable conditions. This
refers to the fact that we never know how bad a situation can turn out to be. For example
, my father-in-law agreed to do a chemoteraphy
to cure his cancer. Correct your spelling
chemotherapy
This
decision badly impacted his condition
, and he passed away ten months after his first treatment. This
disadvantage emphasizes the necessity of proactive action to solve the issue.
Although
taking risks
has disadvantages
, the advantages far outweigh the disadvantages
. We can increase our chances of success and learn life lessons by taking risks
. Whereas
the unbearable condition
after taking risks
should not be neglected, it can be resolved by discussing it with others who have a better experience. Therefore
, with the right measures, the beneficial impact of [topic] may be obtained, making it a useful tool in today's world.
In conclusion, whereas
taking risks
has drawbacks, such
as an unberable
Correct your spelling
unbearable
condition
, the benefits
are clear. Thus
, it appears that the advantages of taking risks
outweigh their disadvantages
, underscoring their importance in our modern society.Submitted by mayaanita.studi on
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task achievement
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for your discussion by outlining both the advantages and disadvantages of taking risks. However, consider using more specific and varied examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. This will enhance the logical flow of your essay and help the reader follow your argument more easily.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion neatly summarizes your main points but could be strengthened by reiterating the key reasons why the advantages outweigh the disadvantages in a more compelling way.
task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the prompt and provides a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages, which is a strong point.
task achievement
You have used specific examples, like your brother's career change and father-in-law's chemotherapy, to illustrate your points. This adds depth and relevance to your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clearly defined and contribute to the overall coherence of your essay.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example