IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

A friend has agreed to look after your house and pet while you are on holiday. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: give contact details for when you are away give instructions about how to care for your pet describe other household duties

#friend #house #pet #holiday #contact #instructions #care #household #duties
Dear Samira, I hope
this
 letter finds you radiant in health and best of spirits. I am writing
this
 letter to say that you will help me out to look after my house when I am away from my house . As you know I was planning to apply for a job at Tesla company whose main branch is in Mumbai. I received an invitation from them for an interview. It will take me at least 5 days to finish up with my all paperwork over there
due to
 which I have to be away from my house and my pet. Hope you can take care of my
pet
Fix the agreement mistake
pets
show examples
 as you love them a lot. The pin of my electric door is 2545.
Moreover
, I have kept all the stuff that my pet needs regarding his feed and cleaning on the top cabinet of the kitchen.
In addition
 to
this
, I am expecting to receive some documents in my letter box so please keep an eye on them every morning.
However
, you don't need to worry about the maintenance of the backyard as I already did. Hope you will have a good time here and want you to stay for 2-3 days once I come back to sit together. Warm wishes Gurpreet Kaur
Submitted by gp04101995 on

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task achievement
Your letter nicely covers the main points: contact details, instructions for pet care, and household duties. However, you might want to clarify your availability for contact in case of emergencies by providing a phone number or email.
coherence cohesion
You could improve the logical structure by separating the paragraphs more distinctly. For instance, use one paragraph for your plans, another for pet instructions, and another for household duties.
suitable writing tone
You've used a friendly and suitable tone throughout the letter, making it engaging and pleasant to read.
greeting and closing
The greeting and closing are well-executed, giving the letter a nice personal touch.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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