The chart below shows the number of travellers using three major airports in New York City between 1995 and 2000.

The chart below shows the number of travellers using three major airports in New York City between 1995 and 2000.
the chart
illustrated
Wrong verb form
illustrates
show examples
the number of
airport
passangers
Correct your spelling
passengers
per year in three different
airport
Change to a plural noun
airports
show examples
in New York City from 1995 to 2000.
to begin
with, in
general
Add a comma
general,
show examples
it can be seen that the
visitors
Correct quantifier usage
number of visitors
show examples
in all three airports has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased during the period.
Additionally
,
while
the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of
people
in LaGuardia
airport
and Newark
airport
Capitalize word
Airport
show examples
consistently
risen up
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
from the beginning to the end of
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
, the visitor of John F Kennedy
airport
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
been fluctuating for the
last
six years. in detail, LaGuardia
airport
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
the most passengers
is
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
the beginning year which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
reached 35
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people
and consistently
inceased
Correct your spelling
increased
even in
slightly
Change the adverb
slight
show examples
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
show examples
until 1999 to 50
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people
then
rocketed to 70
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
visitors in 2000.
otherwise
, the amount of
people
who visited Newark
airport
in 1995
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
, only 15
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people
but it significantly
jump
Wrong verb form
jumped
show examples
to 40
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
passangers
Correct your spelling
passengers
in 1997 and remained stable until 2000. unlike the others, the
people
Correct quantifier usage
number of people
show examples
who visited John F Kennedy
Airport
was jump
Change the verb form
was jumped
was jumping
show examples
up from 25
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
to 45
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
in the first three years
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
then
dropped to 35
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people
in 1998 and 30
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
people
in 1999. thankfully after
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
it climbed to
appoximately
Correct your spelling
approximately
45 million
passenger
Change to a plural noun
passengers
show examples
.
overall
,
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
the end of period the LaGuardia
airport
's passengers
is
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
almost twice more compared
to
Change preposition
as
show examples
the
visitor
Fix the agreement mistake
visitors
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
John F Kenedy and Neward
airport
Submitted by wiworose on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words airport, people, millions with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "jump" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • significant increase
  • highest number
  • steady increase
  • largest growth
  • dramatic
  • slowest growth
  • slight decrease
  • gradual increase
  • period
  • travelers
  • major airports
  • followed by
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