In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

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There is no denying the fact that numerous

Correct article usage

apply

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societies are now living longer than ever before.

While

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It is a commonly held belief that some individuals say an ageing population creates issues ‎‏For governments, there is

also

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an argument that other people believe there are benefits if communities have elderly people.

This

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essay will analyse

this

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topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, increased demand for healthcare services leads to higher costs for the government.

In other words

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, establishing a care home for older adult contributes to enhancing their well-being and providing better career opportunities.

In addition

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, older adults can contribute to society through volunteering and sharing wisdom.

For example

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, the school trips.

On the other hand

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, governments may need to implement policies to encourage higher rates or extend retirement age. It is

also

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possible to say that studies have proven the effectiveness of government encouragement and assistance to families in significantly the birth rate.

Moreover

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,they are able to work for longer and after retirement, they contribute in many ways too.

For instance

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, doing charitable work,

also

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grandparents caring for their young grandchildren.In conclusion, there are no easy answers to

this

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question. On balance,

however

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, I tend to believe that an ageing population poses challenges for governments,

it is clear that

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these are outweighed by the significant benefits that elderly people bring to society.

01_salver_cheekTue May 21 2024

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coherence cohesion

The introduction of the essay is quite brief and does not fully establish the context of the discussion. It should clearly outline the main points that will be discussed in the body paragraphs. Expanding the introduction will provide a stronger foundation for the essay.

coherence cohesion

The body paragraphs present some valid points, but they are somewhat disjointed. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that supporting statements and examples are directly related. More detailed explanations and development of ideas are needed for stronger coherence.

coherence cohesion

The essay's conclusion provides a balanced summary but should tie all the main points together more effectively. Reinforce the main arguments to clearly demonstrate how the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

task achievement

While you have addressed the task, the response could be more detailed and focused. Make sure to delve deeper into the discussion of both advantages and disadvantages, providing concrete examples and explanations for each point mentioned.

task achievement

Your points are clear but could benefit from more elaboration. Clarify and expand on how older adults contribute to society and the specific challenges faced by governments.

task achievement

Examples used in the essay should be more specific and detailed. Rather than general statements like 'school trips,' consider providing concrete instances and explain their relevance to your argument.

coherence cohesion

You have a good understanding of the topic and can see both sides of the argument, which is excellent for critical thinking and balanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

You've made an effort to include a conclusion that sums up your arguments, which is essential for a well-rounded essay.

task achievement

The essay shows a reasonable attempt to address both advantages and disadvantages, demonstrating comprehension of the question.

task achievement

Your ideas are generally clear, and you provide a balanced view, which reflects an understanding of the complex nature of the topic.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

2 paragraphs

228 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

ageing population
benefits
disadvantages
advantages
experience
knowledge
contribution
economy
society
healthcare
youth employment
community
intergenerational support
volunteerism
mentorship
increased demand
pension costs
social welfare systems
workforce
productivity
intergenerational conflict
technological adaptability
dependency
effective
skill development
employment opportunities
intergenerational solidarity
communication
lifelong learning
technological literacy
age-friendly
social policies
infrastructure

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

In recent years, the family structure and the role of its members are gradually changing. What kinds of changes can occur? Do you think these changes are positive and negative?

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. Other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

You see an advertisement for a product. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter Tell your friend where you saw the advertisement Describe the product Explain why your friend should buy this product.

The most importance aim of science should be to improve peoples lives to what extent do you agree os disagree with this statements

Robots and AI are being developed to replace humans in the workplace. Why is this happening? Do you think this will have a positive or negative impact on society?