The plans show a school library 5 years ago and the same library now.

Contained in two illustrations is information pertaining to the transformation of a
library
at a school during a five-year period. From an observational perspective, the
library
has experienced a significant rise in the number of public amenities
while
making use of some blank spaces for new facilities.
Additionally
, the top bookshelves and the meeting room were left untouched. Beginning with the top right of the plan, there used to be a desk for computers five years ago but now, it was converted into a place where students can use their personal laptops. At the bottom right corner, the
library
office was repurposed into a conference room
while
the old bookshelves beside that were
also
being removed to make space for a students' laptops area. Moving to the left half of the layout, the borrowing and returning desk was cleared to construct two distinct borrowing and returning rooms.
Moreover
, the building used for teaching was transformed into a recording studio.
Lastly
, in the centre of the
library
, 4 studying tables were replaced by 6 brand-new private studying tables.
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Improvement
Consider introducing more specific details about the layout changes to better support your main points. This will improve the overall descriptiveness and clarity of your essay.
Improvement
To enhance coherence, you may want to use additional linking words or phrases that connect different sections of your essay more smoothly.
Strength
Your introduction effectively sets the stage for the discussion and clearly states the time frame of the transformation.
Strength
The essay covers all key aspects of the layout changes, showing a good understanding of the task.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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