In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many differences from their home country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reasons? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #travel #differences #home #country #cities #world

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People used to travel to different countries in the past, but,

on the other hand

, there are similarities between metropolises all over the world. The main contributor to

this

issue is globalization,

moreover

, I would argue that the benefits of

this

are far more significant than the drawbacks. The root cause of

this

problem is the considerable innovation in the downtown. As downtown are becoming resemble each other, which are referred to have been developed. By doing

this

, authorities and citizens find it easier for economic and social growth.

Moreover

, the migration of people to the

cities

contributes to the cultural blend which bridges the gap between them.

As a result

, there are few differences between urban as their development is based on other urban models and the merging of cultures. The uniformity of the metropolis indeed helps create bridge-building and promote positive changes downtown. It offers urban dwellers

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a multicultural environment which breaks the language barrier and brings the community closer.

This

brings about the elite human resources as they are free to share their ideas and thoughts.

As a result

, it benefits both the society and the economy of those

cities

Nevertheless

, similar urbanization among metropolises can lead to the uniqueness loss of the area. Take Ha Long Bay, which is a famous tourist destination in Vietnam as an example.

This

place is no longer enjoyable for traditional activities but is being replaced by economic and citylike activities including hiring a range of vehicles for travelling and staying in a hotel.

Consequently

, metropolitan activities are mitigated by the specific value of

cities

. On balance, there are fewer differences between

cities

due to

the impact of globalization.

Therefore

, I strongly believe that the advantages trump the disadvantages

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task achievement

The introduction effectively presents the topic, but make sure to streamline your ideas to maintain focus. Stating the main point clearly in the opening paragraph can enhance clarity.

task achievement

Consider using more specific examples to illustrate your points better. This helps in providing a clear context for your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Ensure logical connections between paragraphs and ideas. Making use of transitional phrases can improve the flow of your essay.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion is strong and summarizes the essay effectively. It clearly states your stance on the topic, bringing the essay to a coherent end.

coherence cohesion

The essay is well-structured with clear introductory and concluding sections. Arguments in the body paragraphs are distinct and focused on the topic.

task achievement

You address both the reasons for cities becoming similar and the advantages and disadvantages, demonstrating a thorough understanding of the task.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

289 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

globalization
cultural assimilation
multinational companies
technological advancement
transferable
homogenization
international visitors
urbanization
infrastructure
architectural styles
public spaces
economic opportunities
cultural exchange
local identity
diversity
cultural homogenization

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In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many differences from their home country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reasons? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

You visited a hotel last week and left some items behind. Write a letter to the manager stating 1. Details of your stay 2. How important the items are to you 3. How you would want the items to the sent to you

Some people say it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Shops should not be allowed to sell food and drinks tha are scientifically proven to be bad for people's health. To what extend do you agree or disagree?