In some countries, online shopping is getting more popular and replacing shopping in stores. Do the advantages of online shopping outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #stores

In today's society, physical

stores

which are being replaced by online shops in many nations have sparked a degree of controversy among

people

Although

this

tendency is not without the disadvantages, the advantages will justify

this

. On the one hand, there are a number of major drawbacks

for

Change preposition

show examples

online shopping.

To begin

with, customers cannot try

products

before making a purchase.

For example

, a girl cannot try wearing a dress to see if it fits her body.

Furthermore

, as items sold online are often less reliable, the

products

that

people

finally

get delivered to their

house

Fix the agreement mistake

houses

show examples

might have a poorer quality than expected.

Finally

, because online shopping is easier and cheaper,

people

tend to buy too much, which would lead to a large waste of money. If shopping in

stores

is more popular,

this

problem will be less likely to happen.

On the other hand

, I believe that the benefits are more significant than

such

disadvantages.

Firstly

, since

people

can buy

products

at home without having to go to

stores

or shopping malls,

this

is a quicker and cheaper way to shop.

For example

, Amazon and eBay are two popular websites that provide a huge number of different

products

, and customers can visit those sites and make purchases easily.

This

allows consumers to save time and the costs of travelling.

Secondly

, as

people

can compare different brands and

products

on the Internet, they can have a wider range of choices when shopping online.

For instance

, buyers can easily compare the shoes of Converse and Adidas and choose to buy the best pair

while

it is difficult to do that at physical

stores

. In conclusion,

while

online shopping has some disadvantages to some extent, I would argue that it is more beneficial.

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Detail Expansion

To improve further, consider expanding on your points with more detailed examples. While your essay is clear and concise, diving deeper into specific instances can enrich your argumentation.

Language Enhancement

Work on slight language precision and complexity to move from 'very good' to 'excellent'. Using more varied sentence structures and higher-level vocabulary can push your essay to the next band.

Logical Structure

Your essay demonstrates a clear and logical structure, making it easy for the reader to follow your arguments.

Introduction/Conclusion

The introduction and conclusion efficiently summarize your main points and provide a coherent framework for your essay.

Examples

You provide relevant examples to support your points, making your arguments more convincing.

Task Achievement

Your response addresses the task fully, discussing both advantages and disadvantages comprehensively.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In some countries, online shopping is getting more popular and replacing shopping in stores. Do the advantages of online shopping outweigh the disadvantages?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Many musuems charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to musuems outweigh the disadvantages?

Fewer and fewer people today right by hand using a pen pencil or brush. What are the reasons? Is this a positive or a negative development?

In many countries, people are working increasingly longer hours. What are the reasons for this. Is this a positive or negative development?

In modern era, it is easy to sell, buy and work with other people through internet. But others against it. Do you think this is positive trend or negative trend.

Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwork should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family and friends. To that extent do you agree or disagree.