Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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There has been a debate about whether
children
should be allowed to make
decisions
on different types of tasks. Some people believe that it would possibly lead to a selfish community if
children
make
decisions
on their own daily needs,
while
others believe that it is more vital for
children
to make
choices
about things that affect them.
This
essay aims to discuss both views
along with
my opinion. On one hand, independence is a crucial skill that
children
need to cultivate, especially in a world filled with abundant
choices
. When
children
can decide on their own, they are more likely to have independent thinking abilities.
For example
,
children
come up with ideas of what to wear not only means that they know themselves in depth but are
also
willing to share their thoughts. They clearly understand what colors they like, and which outfit style they would like to exhibit and share the clothing concept with others.
Moreover
, they might be more determined when facing issues since they know which is the most suitable choice.
Thus
, I believe that
children
making their own
decisions
results in a unique community
instead
of a selfish one.
On the other hand
, being able to decide on serious issues is indeed important,
nevertheless
, it is
also
vital to make basic
choices
as they are part of their life. In my opinion,
children
should be required with the ability to practice comprehensive thinking and be responsible.
For instance
, when
children
lack in ability to
decide
Verb problem
make
show examples
basic
choices
such
as culinary options, it might lead to
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
irresponsible
consequence
Fix the agreement mistake
consequences
show examples
because they don't need to make up their minds on
such
simple needs. In conclusion, I believe that making
decisions
in daily and effective matters is equally crucial.
However
,
children
should not be restricted by what they are allowed to decide.
In contrast
,
children
should be encouraged to think and make
decisions
on every task independently, furthering their unique ideas and afterwards resulting in an exclusive community.
Submitted by vsunnloe147 on

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task achievement
You did well in providing a discussion on both sides of the argument and gave your opinion. However, the examples provided could be more specific and connected closely to support the main argument.
coherence cohesion
Try to ensure that your sentences are varied in length and structure, as it helps maintain the reader's interest and improves overall readability.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames the discussion nicely.
task achievement
You provided a balanced discussion of both views which is a strong point for the task achievement.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Autonomy
  • Consequence-awareness
  • Self-centered
  • Informal decision-making education
  • Child development
  • Age-appropriate choices
  • Cognitive growth
  • Fostering independence
  • Parental guidance
  • Societal norms
  • Interpersonal consideration
  • Balance of freedom
  • Individualism versus collectivism
  • Experience-based learning
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