Write a letter to the transport officer about a problem with transport system in your area. Describe a situation you are facing Why do you consider it a problem What changes would you like to recommend

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am Kiranpreet Kaur residing in the city of Surrey since 2021. The reason I am writing to you is about the difficulties faced by travellers who use The Translink services.
To begin
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with,
due to
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rising
Correct article usage
the rising
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population of the city, it is becoming difficult to see a bus or skytrain which is not crowded. The transportation
system
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of our area is not keeping up with the pace of the growth of our community. The pressure on our
system
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can be noticed when we have to travel in the buses. The
system
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is already broken because people get late to their work or school when they commute by
buses
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bus
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or
trains
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train
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. They have to travel without a seat which
make
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makes
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them feel so tired
while
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coming home from work and frustrated with the situation of the services. So, people usually express
this
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kind of dissatisfaction which is compelling
this
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system
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to change. To resolve
this
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problem, there is a need to introduce more routes to reduce the pressure built up on a limited service.
Besides
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this
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, distant areas of the city should be connected to the downtown to improve accessibility. I hope these suggestions will help you to improve the services. Yours faithfully, Kiranpreet Kaur
Submitted by Kiran on

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coherence cohesion
Your letter contains a clear greeting and closing, which is great. However, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea for better clarity.
task achievement
While you addressed the issue well, adding a few more specific details about how this problem affects different groups of people (like students, elderly) could improve your response.
task achievement
The letter is polite and maintains a suitable tone throughout, which adds to its effectiveness.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure is mostly well-maintained, making it easy to follow the flow of ideas.
coherence cohesion
Clear and effective greeting and closing enhance the overall professionalism of the letter.
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