IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Fossil fuels (e.g. coals, oil and gas) are the main source of energy for most countries. However, alternative sources of energy (e.g. wind and solar) have been encouraged for use by some countries. To what extent is this a positive or negative development?

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Fossil fuels like coal, oil, and gas have been the main source of
energy
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 for many years. They provide power for homes, businesses, and transportation.
However
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, these
energy
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 sources cause pollution and contribute to climate change. Because of
this
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, some countries are encouraging the use of
alternative
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energy
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,
such
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 as
wind
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 and solar power.
This
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 is mostly a positive development. One of the biggest benefits of
alternative
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energy
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 is that it is clean. Unlike fossil fuels,
wind
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 and solar power do not produce harmful gases that pollute the air.
This
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 helps to slow down global warming and improves air quality, which is good for people’s health.
Also
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, fossil fuels are limited, meaning they will run out one day.
In contrast
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,
wind
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 and sunlight are unlimited, so they can provide
energy
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 for the future. Another advantage is that renewable
energy
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 can create new jobs. Many workers are needed to build and maintain
wind
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 turbines and solar panels.
This
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 can help the economy grow and provide employment opportunities for many people.
However
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, there are
also
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 some challenges.
Alternative
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energy
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 depends on weather conditions. If there is no sun or
wind
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, less
energy
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 is produced.
Also
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, the cost of setting up
wind
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 and solar farms can be high. Some countries may not have enough money to invest in these technologies.
Overall
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, using
alternative
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energy
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 is a positive development. It helps the environment, creates jobs, and provides a long-term
energy
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 solution. Even though there are challenges, the benefits are greater.

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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position on the topic and addresses the advantages of alternative energy sources effectively. To improve, consider elaborating on the counterarguments to provide a more balanced view.
coherence and cohesion
To enhance coherence, try to use more varied linking words and phrases to connect your ideas smoothly. For example, use words like 'Furthermore' or 'Moreover' to introduce additional points.
task achievement
You could strengthen your supported main points by providing more specific examples. Instead of just stating that renewable energy creates jobs, mention specific types of jobs or projects that have had a positive impact.
introduction
Your introduction clearly outlines the main topic and stance, which helps guide the reader through the essay.
content
You effectively explain the benefits of alternative energy, making your arguments persuasive and relevant to the prompt.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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