IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many believe that the best way to solve environmental problems is to increase the price of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#price #fuel
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Countless individuals believe that the most suitable way to solve environmental issues is to increase significantly the
prices
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 of
fuel
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. I completely disagree with the said notion. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss why increasing the
prices
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 of
fuel
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 would not be the best measure to solve environmental
problems
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. In recent years, there have been various factors affecting the environment. One of the primary reasons is deforestation, which is associated with many other
problems
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. The best way to solve environmental
problems
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 is by introducing ways to reduce pollution and the destruction of trees.
For instance
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, a survey conducted in New Delhi which is considered one of the most polluted cities around the world has proved that deforestation is one of the biggest reasons for environmental
problems
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 like air pollution and global warming.
However
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, it is the responsibility of the government to take strict actions against these important issues rather than increasing
fuel
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prices
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.
Additionally
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, the hike in
fuel
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prices
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 could
also
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 affect factors like affordability.
In other words
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, people below the poverty line and lower-middle-class families will not be able to make use of motor vehicles or cars that they are already driving. Pakistan is a country that saw the highest level of inflation in 2022, which impacted people in terms of affordability.
Hence
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, the increase in the price of
fuel
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 could lead to many other issues, rather than solving environmental
problems
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. In conclusion, deforestation is associated with many environmental
problems
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 like air pollution and global warming, and
hence
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 the government should find solutions for the same.
Moreover
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, I believe that
fuel
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prices
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 are the least factor affecting our environment, if it increases it may lead to many
problems
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.
Submitted by brishjot999 on

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic well, but to improve the task response, make sure to comprehensively discuss both the potential benefits and drawbacks of increasing fuel prices. This will make your argument more balanced and thorough.
coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, aim to use more varied transition words and phrases. This will make your essay more fluid and help to better connect your ideas.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is logically structured, with each paragraph focusing on a specific point.
task achievement
You provided relevant and specific examples, such as the survey in New Delhi and the situation in Pakistan, to support your points.
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