Topic 18: Some people say that television is useful for education, while others say that it is only useful for entertainment. Discuss both views and gives your own opinion.
Whether the implementation of TV will
brings
benefit to the education or not Change the verb form
bring
is
emerged as a controversial topic of interest . The writer of Verb problem
has
this
essay claims that even though this
may lead to the TV addiction of youngsters , it is more likely to provide valuable lessons as well as
entertaining
them .
One of the compelling reasons which Wrong verb form
entertain
explains
why TV must be Change the verb form
explain
impereative
for education is how it is able to teach Correct your spelling
imperative
children
about history . That is
to say , a host of program
on Fix the agreement mistake
programs
television
are created in order to intergrate
Correct your spelling
integrate
the
historical knowledge into that so that Correct article usage
apply
children
can learn about history throughout
various platforms . Change preposition
through
Therefore
, this
must be benefical
since new generations can promote their respect for the Correct your spelling
beneficial
sacrify
of their ancestors for the independence of Correct your spelling
sacrifice
nation
.
Add an article
the nation
a nation
On the other hand
, it is understandable why people
think that television
mostly entertain
Change the verb form
entertains
children
. This
is because ,
the fundamental advantage of Remove the comma
apply
this
gadget is becoming a relaxing tool for people
after hard working hours due to
its various content for entertainment . As a result
, by watching so many programms
on Correct your spelling
programmes
programs
this
device , people
they
can not only let their hair down but Correct pronoun usage
apply
also
recharge their energy , being ready for a new effective working day .
In the writer's opinion , due to
the convenience of television
, there is no denying about
its benefit for education . Change preposition
apply
That is
to say , the new generations tend to get exposed to modern gadgets since they are really young which means if people
intergrate
educational content into Correct your spelling
integrate
this
gadget , it can promote children
's awareness about the world around them . Taking animals program
as a specific example , by creating Fix the agreement mistake
animal programs
a
content about Remove the article
apply
this
, people
they
can improve Correct pronoun usage
apply
the
understanding of Change the word
their
children
about the world of animals around them
In conclusion , even though the core role of the
Correct article usage
apply
television
is entertaining children
, it is more likely to become a more Correct your spelling
integral
intergral
part of their life , especially how it educates them about the worldCorrect your spelling
integral
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grammar
Be sure that all sentences are clear and grammatically correct for a more professional tone. For instance, 'is emerged' should be 'has emerged,' and 'must be imperative' should simply be 'is imperative.' Avoid small grammatical errors and typos.
depth of development
Ensure that all ideas are elaborated upon significantly enough. Some of your points, while valid, could benefit from more depth and explanation. For example, when mentioning historical programs, specify how they positively impact learning outcomes.
linking words
To strengthen coherence and cohesion, make use of linking words and phrases that smoothly connect ideas. For example, transitioning between your points using terms like 'Moreover,' 'In addition,' or 'However,' helps the reader follow your argument better.
task requirement
You address both views adequately and provide your own opinion clearly. This meets the requirement of the task.
structure strength
Your introduction and conclusion are both present, which gives your essay a well-rounded structure. The conclusion summarizes your views succinctly.
example use
Relevant examples, such as historical programs and animal content, are given to support your points, enhancing the essay's persuasiveness.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.