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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many countries have the same shops and products. Some consider it a positive development, whereas others consider it negative. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#countries #shops #products #consider #development
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In the era of globalization, it has become common for
countries
 to have the same
shops
 and
products
. Some view
this
 as a positive development,
while
 others consider it negative. In
this
 essay, we will discuss both perspectives and present our own viewpoint. Some people regard the presence of identical
shops
 and
products
 across
countries
 as a positive development.
Firstly
, they argue that it provides convenience for consumers who can find their
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
products
 without needing to travel far.
Secondly
, the uniformity in
shops
 and
products
 fosters unity and connectivity among nations, creating a sense of global community.
However
, others see
this
 as a negative trend. One reason is that the uniformity in
shops
 and
products
 may lead to a loss of cultural and local
diversity
.
This
 could erode the uniqueness and richness of each nation.
Additionally
, the homogeneity in
products
 may
also
 result in unhealthy competition between local businesses and multinational corporations. In my opinion, the presence of identical
shops
 and
products
 in various
countries
 has both positive and negative aspects. On one hand, it offers convenience and promotes global unity.
On the other hand
, it risks diminishing cultural
diversity
 and may lead to unfair competition.
Therefore
, it is essential to strike a balance and ensure that
while
 global connectivity is fostered, cultural
diversity
 and local businesses are
also
 protected. In conclusion, the phenomenon of
countries
 having the same
shops
 and
products
 brings both benefits and drawbacks.
However
, it is crucial to carefully assess and manage
this
 trend to preserve cultural
diversity
 and support sustainable development.
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task achievement
The essay is well-structured and contains a clear introduction and conclusion. However, try to provide more specific examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, and consider elaborating more on your points to provide deeper insight into both views.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear, logical structure with an introduction, a balanced discussion of both views, and a well-rounded conclusion.
task achievement
The response thoroughly addresses both perspectives and provides a personal stance, which is clearly articulated.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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