The chart below shows the number of adults participating in different major sports in one area, in 1997 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the number of adults participating in different major sports in one area, in 1997 and 2017. 

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar graph illustrates the proportion of adults participating in various popular
sports
Use synonyms
in one specific place from 1997 to 2017.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
of people participating in
sports
Use synonyms
have been
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
increased throughout the
periods
Fix the agreement mistake
period
show examples
. Despite that, there
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
dramatic
Correct article usage
a dramatic
show examples
decreased
Replace the word
decrease
show examples
in people playing cricket in 2017 compared to 1997 whilst, the levels of adults in swimming remained unchanged. The major
sports
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as basketball, football and rugby escalated substantially from approximately, 90, 31 and 32
thousand
Use synonyms
in 1997 to nearly around 22, 48 and 49
thousand
Use synonyms
respectively in 2017. Meanwhile, tennis rose slightly from 50
thousand
Use synonyms
to almost 55
thousand
Use synonyms
in 1997 and 2017 respectively.
Besides
Linking Words
, swimming remained stable with just more than 30
thousand
Use synonyms
over the period of
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
sports
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as golf slightly increased within 2 decades but crickets showed
dramatic
Correct article usage
a dramatic
show examples
decreased
Replace the word
decrease
show examples
from nearly 26
thousand
Use synonyms
to just around 7
thousand
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
1997 to 2017.
Submitted by asllchkied on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such".
Vocabulary: Replace the words sports, thousand with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "dramatic" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • participation rate
  • increase/decrease in numbers
  • trend
  • decade
  • relatively stable
  • major sports
  • potential reasons
  • contributing factors
  • public interest
  • comparison
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