IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people say that the onlu way to guarantee a good job is to complete a course in university eduvation. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #onlu #guarantee #job #course #university #eduvation
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It has been said that the only way to have a good
job
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 is to complete lessons in
university
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education
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. The writer strongly agrees with
this
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 notion as
companies
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 rely on
education
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 to recruit
employees
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 and without
education
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, it is very difficult to get a good
job
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. One of the main reasons why graduating from
university
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 is necessary to get a good
job
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 is that many
companies
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,
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apply
show examples
 focus on
people
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 who complete a
course
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 in
university
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education
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.
In other words
Linking Words
, all of the
companies
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 want to develop and they have
employees
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 who can help them, if the
companies
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 choose
people
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 who have no knowledge and did not graduate from
university
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, they will destroy the
companies
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 as they do not know everything and knowledge.
As a result
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,
people
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 who did not complete a
course
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 in
university
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education
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 will be unemployed and may get into doubt. Another key aspect as to why completing
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
university
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education
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 is essential to get a good
job
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 is without
education
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, it is very difficult to have a good
job
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. To explain
further
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, if a person has no
education
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 that applies for a company or school, their applications might not focus on what the company or school want to find a person has the
education
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 to work for them and they choose a lot of great applications. To put it another way, nowadays, most
companies
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 want their
employees
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 to have an
education
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 and
then
Linking Words
people
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 who did not complete a
course
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 in a
university
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education
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 will be unemployed and they may get into doubt, becoming homeless. In conclusion, completing a
course
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 in
university
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education
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 is very necessary to guarantee a good
job
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 as
companies
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 rely on
education
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 to recruit
employees
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 and if one has no
education
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, it is very difficult to get a good
job
Use synonyms
.
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the prompt and provides a clear stance. However, consider including specific examples or statistical data to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has an introduction and a conclusion, which is excellent. However, work on paragraph transitions to improve the flow of ideas.
task achievement
You have a clear and concise conclusion that summarizes your main points effectively.
coherence cohesion
You have provided a logical structure with distinct paragraphs for different points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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