Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success?

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Certain people believe that

success

can be achieved through professional business or jobs. Others think that academics is the one factor in becoming a successful

person

However

, there are innumerable measures that contribute to

success

such

as health, happiness and money. I concur with the prior that I believe,

success

is something that you enjoy with your near and dear. It is irrefutable that education imparted a

person

with

knowledge

and information so in

this

way an individual has a right move towards

success

Secondly

, it provides a myriad of opportunities to become wealthy.

For instance

, universities empower students with

knowledge

and an efficient way to communicate with others in

this

competitive world. At present well educated become more wealthy as compared to illiterate.

While

good at career or in employment it gives a

person

a shortcut to become successful in the least amount of time because

success

also

associated with experience. Someone said that the more you have experience or

knowledge

the more you become successful in the near future.

On the other hand

success

is not measured by a

person

knowledge

However

, different people have different opinions about it. To elucidate, money, health and happiness are the kinds of

success

Additionally

, making ends meet for the family or dearest is an achievement for some individuals.

Moreover

, health, mental

as well as

physical are precious things for a lot of people.

For example

, happiness ultimately leads to

success

. In conclusion,

Although

education has the power which is needed for

success

On the contrary

success

has different definitions for everyone and in the end everyone needs to become happy and

this

is the real

success

for them.

Submitted by seharfazal9 on Fri May 31 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

To achieve a higher score, refine your transitions between paragraphs to enhance the logical flow of ideas. For example, use clear linking phrases such as "Furthermore" or "In addition" to introduce new points.

Task Achievement

Integrate more specific examples to illustrate your points more effectively. For instance, provide a real-world example of someone who achieved success through education or a specific career path.

Task Achievement

Ensure clarity and improve sentence structure by avoiding overly complex sentences. Simplify where possible to maintain the reader's focus and comprehension.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay has a clear and concise introduction and conclusion, which effectively summarize the main points.

Task Achievement

You have addressed the prompt comprehensively, discussing different perspectives on success and providing your own view.

Coherence and Cohesion

The structure of your essay is logical and your main points are generally well-supported, which aids in reader understanding.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

278 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

fulfillment
personal goals
happiness
career milestones
professional development
financial independence
security
philanthropy
contribution
personal development
recognition
work-life balance
self-improvement
well-being
subjective

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Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success?

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