IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You have been selected for a training course on computer skills that you cannot attend. WRITE A LETTER TO YOUR EMPLOYER AND SAY Explain how this training course would help you Why won't you be able to attend it Suggest a way to have that training again

#course #computer #skills #employer
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Dear I am writing a letter to you to give information, yesterday I got an offer of a job from another company and I am sending a letter to give me permission to out of here. For two days, I have to do for charity and give my date to ask another
humanity
Use synonyms
 in my hometown and ask for money from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
humanity
Use synonyms
 and ask for whatever they have. I am out of here because want to work to get a lot of money and make my family happy. As we know charity can not give income and spend my day just to help another
humanity
Use synonyms
 who needs it. I can't stay here for a long day because need income to buy food and basic needs.
humanity
Use synonyms
 must attention to their lives to get a salary and buy all
family's
Correct article usage
the family's
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 needs. I have a friend to change my position here. Its name
Awan
Add a missing verb
is Awan
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. Maybe he wants to work for a long day. In conclusion,
humanity
Use synonyms
 must give much attention to families because they can not survive in the future without a job and getting payroll.
Submitted by patricius.yohanes on

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task achievement
Clearly state the purpose of your letter in the introduction and maintain focus on that purpose throughout the letter.
coherence cohesion
Use clear and logical paragraphing. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea or point, such as the usefulness of the training, the reason for not attending, and suggesting alternatives.
task achievement
The letter demonstrates an attempt to explain the writer's situation and the need for the training course.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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