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Writing Samples
Band 6

Research indicates that the characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life. Which do you consider to be the major influence?

#research #characteristics #influence #personality #development #experiences #life
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Whether human
behavior
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behaviour
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 is a result of genetic factors more than an environmental influence has become a hotly debated topic nowadays.
While
 some studies have proved that all our reactions can be fully explained by the genome, our society is established on the belief that individuals are products of the circumstances they experience. Behaviorism theory claims that the environment influences the most.
According to
this
 concept, people’s personality is a result of what they learn through interaction with the environment they are living in. In favor of
this
 theory may be the fact that Diego Maradona, without having great physical potential, compared to his peers, became the biggest football player through hard work and dedication. The big opponent of the aforementioned concept is Professor Robert Sapolsky, who argues that human
behavior
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behaviour
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 has a biological explanation.
According to
 his approach, people have no control as they have been programmed by evolution.
Furthermore
, based on the characteristics they are born with they already have their unique personality.
For example
, the study of two twins, who grew up in different adopted families, but somehow chose the same profession and gave their kids the same names, proves his theory. In my opinion, it is very hard to point out what has the greater impact, as it is very hard to distinguish them. Because people normally grow up in their families and copy the
behavior
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behaviour
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 that they see from their parents, it is difficult to analyze if it comes from the environment or is genetically programmed.
To conclude
, taking into consideration all the facts described above, it is still hard to say whether nature or nurture has a bigger impact, as there is not enough data available and particular cases could be exceptions and not rules.
Submitted by vikiregev on

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task achievement
Try to provide a more balanced and critical viewpoint when discussing both nature and nurture. A bit more nuance in discussing how both factors might interact would strengthen the task response.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph flows smoothly to the next. Some transitions between ideas could be made clearer to improve coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction that sets up the debate between genetic factors and environmental influences.
task achievement
Nice use of examples, such as the reference to Diego Maradona and the study of twins, to support the main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • nature vs. nurture debate
  • genetic inheritance
  • personality traits
  • behavior patterns
  • heritability
  • twins studies
  • malleable characteristics
  • upbringing
  • environmental influences
  • critical periods
  • language acquisition
  • worldview
  • innate traits
  • personal experiences
  • psychological development
  • epigenetics
  • adaptive behaviors
  • cultural imprinting
  • temperament
  • social conditioning
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