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Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Some people believe that the internet is increasing the gap between the rich and poor, while others argue that it helps to reduce this gap. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #internet #gap
The
internet
 has changed how we live and work. Some
thinks
Change the verb form
think
show examples
 it makes the
gap
 between rich and poor bigger,
while
 others believe it helps close
this
gap
. I will discuss both views and share my opinion. Some say the
internet
 increases the
gap
.
rich
Capitalize word
Rich
show examples
 people have better access
tp
Correct your spelling
to
show examples
 high-speed
internet
 and good devices.
This
 helps them get more benefits like education, jobs, and business opportunities. Poor people often have limited or no access, which makes it hard for them to compete. Others believe the
internet
 reduces the
gap
. It offers free or cheap education and information, helping poor individuals
learnt
Correct your spelling
learn
show examples
 new skills. Online platforms
creat
Correct your spelling
create
show examples
 job opportunities and allow small businesses to reach a global market, giving chances to those who need
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. I think the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 can both widen and narrow the
gap
.
to
Capitalize word
To
show examples
 help more people benefit, we need to ensure everyone has equal access to technology and the
internet
.
This
 way, we can use the
internet
 to reduce
inquality
Correct your spelling
inequality
in quality
.
Submitted by abdullahnawaf_511 on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points. For example, mention specific online platforms or statistics.
task achievement
Improve your grammar and sentence structure by checking for small errors. For instance, 'tp' should be 'to' and 'learnt' should be 'learn.'
coherence cohesion
Enhance your introduction by providing a brief overview of both views before diving into the discussion.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the conclusion by summarizing the main points discussed and offering a final thought or recommendation.
task achievement
The essay addresses both views and provides an opinion, which is good for task achievement.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized with clear paragraphs discussing each view.
coherence cohesion
The writer shows a good understanding of the topic and attempts to balance the discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • digital divide
  • wealth gap
  • accessibility
  • disadvantaged
  • empowerment
  • digital skills
  • online resources
  • financial disparities
  • bridging the gap
  • digital inclusion
  • economic inequality
  • equal opportunities
  • digital divide
  • information age
  • socioeconomic divide
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