Some people think that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones in communication has negative effects on young people's reading and writing skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The growing use of digital devices in
communication
affects people
's abilities to read and write. Some people
are concerned about some negative impacts regardless of the potential benefits that they could gain from this
trend. I partially agree with this
, for their degrading literacy although
computers and mobile phones sometimes promote their communication
with frequent exchange of messages online.
On the one hand, the spread of electronic gadgets can have a detrimental effect on people
's abilities to read and write as they are less likely to grasp the significant message of a story or a thesis. In other words
, the lack of vocabulary and comprehension skills makes it difficult for them to connect one idea with another, not knowing what messages authors intend to convey. For instance
, it has been made apparent by the proof that the average scores of language by pupils declined dramatically from 5 in 2020 to 3 in 2024. Since more young adults are used to scanning only short sentences about casual life including school, friends and holidays in the message box, they tend to indicate some frustration when it comes to reading long academic articles on history and science.This
damages their critical thinking as they are more reluctant to spend time contemplating abstract ideas and logic with a lot of jargon.
On the other hand
, the increasing dependence on modern tools does not necessarily lead to their lower reading and writing skills as people
engage in more communicative activities on the Internet. Indeed, as smartphones have become essential tools for communication
, many young people
interact with each other as they frequently exchange written messages and private photos on SNS such
as Facebook and Instagram to build intimate relationships. Furthermore
, they are often expected to respond more instantly to random comments continuously posted by friends and family, which encourages them to spot the intentions of others and verbalize their feelings in a limited time. Therefore
, they are able to articulate themselves better thanks to the constant habit of using electronic gadgets to connect with other people
.
In conclusion, I somewhat agree that there is potential damage to young adults reading and writing due to
their growing reliance on digital devices as they are less patient in reading sophisticated books. However
, they sometimes promote their communication
skills with the rising need to understand various information as well as
respond more quickly to a fast-changing world.Submitted by mizuho on
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coherence cohesion
To further enhance the coherence and cohesion, try to use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly. Phrases like 'Moreover,' 'Additionally,' and 'Conversely,' can help to create a more seamless flow between your points.
task achievement
Ensure that you address both the positive and negative impacts of digital devices on reading and writing skills in a balanced manner. While you did discuss both sides, a more in-depth exploration of each point would provide a more comprehensive response.
task achievement
Support your arguments with more detailed and varied examples, which can strengthen your points and make your essay more convincing.
coherence cohesion
You provided a well-structured essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. This makes it easy for the reader to follow your thoughts.
coherence cohesion
Your arguments are well-organized, and each paragraph effectively focuses on a single point, which enhances the clarity of your essay.
task achievement
The essay covers the prompt comprehensively by discussing the potential negative and positive effects of digital devices on reading and writing skills.
task achievement
You incorporated relevant examples which help contextualize your arguments, making them more persuasive.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.