IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

some countries invest a significant amount of money in promoting the use of bicycles. why do you think this is the case? Does it have a positive or a negative impact on individuals and the society?

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In modern times, the majority of nations stimulate residents
using
Change the verb form
to use
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bicycles
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 as their main
mean
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means
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 of transportation by investing
remarkable
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in remarkable
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 funding. The primary reason for
this
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 development stems
frm
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from
environment
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environmental
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 protection.
Additionally
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, the writer of
this
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 essay does suppose that it has positive effects on individuals
due to
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 cost-effectiveness
as well as
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 society avoiding
traffic
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 congestion. It must be understood that most countries aim to orient to an eco-friendly living space when making
investment
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investments
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on
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in
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 the use of
bicycles
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. To put it simply, in comparison to private vehicles,
bicycles
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 do not require fuel, but
instead
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, rely on
human-being's
Correct your spelling
human beings '
 physical fitness.
As a result
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, it will not release emissions or pollutants into the environment, leading to minimizing the severe air pollution in metropolises.
Therefore
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, people
opt
Wrong verb form
opting
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for riding
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to ride
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bicycles
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 can contribute to
protect
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protecting
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 the surroundings. Foremost, it is on account of saving budget that riding bikes
benefits
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benefit
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 every resident, making it a potential improvement. More specifically, on
condition
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the condition
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 that individuals cycle as their main way to travel, they will not have to spend on refilling fuels or parking
lot
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lots
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 as car users do.
Moreover
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, it can undeniably support each
people
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person
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 to concentrate on more essential
expenditure
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expenditures
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such
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 as housing costs. Thereby, thanks to cycling, cyclists are able to be more effectively well-managed
their
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in their
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 finances.
Last
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 but not least, mitigating the heavy
traffic
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 jams is another contribution when it comes to riding
bicycles
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. In
further
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 explanation, the increasing phenomenon of
traffic
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 congestion in developing cities is largely owing to the overuse of cars or trucks which account for
spaces
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space
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.
Consequently
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, when
traveling
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travelling
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 on roads during rush hours, it may easily cause
traffic
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 jams. Contrastingly,
bicycles
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 are designed in a compact way, resulting in users carrying along everywhere and whenever they wish to, regardless of office hours. In conclusion, reducing environmental issues
coupled
Verb problem
apply
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is the main
purposes
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purpose
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 of the government in terms of encouraging people
riding
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to ride
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bicycles
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
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, it can
be create
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create
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 a positive development
among
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in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society because of saving finances
along with
Linking Words
 mitigating
traffic
Use synonyms
 jams.

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grammar
There are some grammatical and lexical mistakes, such as "frm" (should be "from"), "human-being's physical fitness" (should be "human physical fitness"), and "making it a potential improvement" (the phrasing can be more precise). Consider proofreading for such errors.
clarity
Some sentences are lengthy and can be broken down for better clarity. For instance, the first sentence of the second paragraph is quite complex and can be split into two or more sentences to enhance readability.
structure
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, establishing the main ideas and summarizing them effectively.
content
The essay covers multiple reasons why promoting cycling is advantageous and supports them with logical explanations.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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