IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The table below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.

The table below gives information about the underground railway systems in six cities.
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The given table demonstrates the data pertaining to the subway systems throughout 6 different metropolitan regions.
Overall
Linking Words
, the earliest underground
raiway
Correct your spelling
railway
 was
etablished
Correct your spelling
established
 in London, which was the longest
route
Use synonyms
. Whilst, the opposite was true for Kyoto.
Additionally
Linking Words
, The most crowded subway could be seen in
Tokyo
Use synonyms
. In
further
Linking Words
 detail, the subway station
locating
Wrong verb form
located
show examples
 in London was the
most
Change the adjective
apply
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longest railway
in
Change preposition
of
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 all time about 394
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
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. Following
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Paris, the length of
Use synonyms
route
Correct article usage
the route
show examples
recorded
Add a missing verb
was recorded
show examples
 at 199 km. there were
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
similar figures about the
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
route
Add an article
the route
a route
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 to
Tokyo
Use synonyms
 and Washington DC at 155 and 126, respectively. Regarding Los Angeles,
railway
Add an article
the railway
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 was comparably lower at 28km. In 1981,
Tokyo
Use synonyms
 unfolded figure at 11km of
route
Use synonyms
. Turning to the amount of passengers per year in
Tokyo
Use synonyms
accounting
Replace the word
accounts
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 for 1927m of people, which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 it the most occupied place. moving on to Paris, searching for people saw at 1191m in population.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the number of passengers in London was 775m.
In contrast
Linking Words
, Kyoto and Los
Angleles
Correct your spelling
Angeles
 had almost the same sum at 45 and 50, respectively.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words route, tokyo with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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