Poor infrastructure hinders under-developed countries from progressing and modernising. Some people think that this should be the first problem tackled by foreign aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#infrastructure #countries #people #first #aid

In under-developed countries, inadequate

infrastructure

serves as a significant obstacle to progress and modernization. Some people think that

this

should be the first problem tackled by

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

foreign aid. I disagree with

this

statement and would like to

further

delve into

this

statement. One reason why solely focusing on improving

infrastructure

with foreign aid may not be the most effective approach is because

under-developed

Correct your spelling

underdeveloped

show examples

countries often face

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

other challenges which are more crucial and priority is needed to tackle these. Pressing issues

such

as healthcare, education and socio-economic disparities

also

impede progress.

For example

, lack of access to quality healthcare and education can be damaging, ultimately hampering the workforce needed to contribute to

infrastructure

projects.

Furthermore

, simply

priotizing

Correct your spelling

prioritising

infrastructure

development without addressing underlying pressing issues can result in unsustainable outcomes. Countries may find themselves with debt from large-scale

infrastructure

projects that

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

may not benefit immediately.

For example

construction

Correct article usage

the construction

show examples

of a highway or a building may not be beneficial if the majority cannot

accesss

Correct your spelling

access

due

Correct pronoun usage

it due

show examples

affordibility

Correct your spelling

affordability

. In conclusion,

while

infrastructure

development is vital, it should not be the sole focal point of foreign aid efforts. Addressing and prioritising critical aspects

such

as healthcare, education and socio-economic disparities, the country can create a more comprehensive foundation for

sustainable

Correct article usage

a sustainable

show examples

future.

Submitted by sejal.h on Mon Jun 03 2024

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supported main points

Ensure that all arguments are supported by specific and relevant examples. For instance, provide real-world examples of countries where infrastructure investments have failed due to lack of simultaneous investments in healthcare or education.

clear comprehensive ideas

Provide a more balanced discussion by acknowledging some benefits of focusing on infrastructure development as well. This shows a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

introduction conclusion present

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, making it easy to follow the argument.

logical structure

The logical structure of the essay allows for a clear flow of ideas, making it relatively easy to follow and understand.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

210 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Poor infrastructure hinders under-developed countries from progressing and modernising. Some people think that this should be the first problem tackled by foreign aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Word Count

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