When new towns are planned, it is important to build more public parks and sports facilities rather than shopping centres for people to spend their time in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The planning of new towns is important which sets the foundation for a community's development and the quality of life it offers to its
residents
. I agree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
this
statement and believe that more emphasis should be placed
upon
Change preposition
on
show examples
constructing
pulic
Correct your spelling
public
parks
and
sports
facilities
rather than shopping centres.
This
essay will expound on the reasons behind
this
perspective. The provision of public
parks
and
sports
facilities
contributes significantly to the
phycial
Correct your spelling
physical
and mental
well being
Add a hyphen
well-being
show examples
of the
residents
. These spaces serve as venues for exercise, recreation, and social interaction.
For example
, a
well maintained
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well-maintained
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park provides
and
Correct your spelling
an
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environment for people of all ages to
engate
Correct your spelling
engage
in various
phycial
Correct your spelling
physical
activities, from jogging and yoga to team
sports
.
Such
activities not only promise a healthier lifestyle but
also
fosters
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foster
show examples
a sense of community and belonging among the
residents
. The public
parks
and
sports
facilities
play a pivotal role in enhancing
overall
Correct article usage
the overall
show examples
aesthetics and
ambiance
Change the spelling
ambience
show examples
of a town. Lush green spaces,
well designed
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well-designed
show examples
playgrounds, and
sports
fields create an inviting and pleasant environment for
residents
to enjoy
whereas
shopping centres may lead to congestion, increased traffic, and a more commercialised
athmosphere
Correct your spelling
atmosphere
, which could detract from the town's
overall
livability. In conclusion, prioritisation of public
parks
and
sports
facilities
while
planning for new towns is paramount for fostering a healthier, more vibrant, and cohesive community.
Submitted by sejal.h on

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task achievement
Check for spelling errors (e.g., 'phycial' should be 'physical', 'engate' should be 'engage', 'athmosphere' should be 'atmosphere').
task achievement
Ensure subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'parks provides' to 'parks provide').
coherence cohesion
Enhance the use of linking words and phrases to improve flow between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
The main points are generally well-supported and relevant to the topic.
task achievement
The essay covers all parts of the question and provides a complete response.

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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