Today people are surrounded by advertising. This affects what people think is important and has a negative impact on people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Advertisements are ubiquitous in modern society, and it is true that they impact
people
's values and can negatively affect their lives. However
, this
writer disagrees that advertisements uniformly exert a detrimental influence on both the demand and the view of the customers, as the
promotion can help inform Correct article usage
apply
people
in various aspects.
It must be understood that advertising does play a major role in shaping people
's desires and perceptions of what is important. When we are constantly bombarded with images of luxury goods, beauty products and the latest fashions, this
understandably makes us focus more on materialism, appearance and consuming
. There is evidence that countries with higher advertising spend per Replace the word
consumption
capital
Correct your spelling
capita
also
have higher materialism scores. This
obsession with products and status can lead to problems like over-spending
, debt, and dissatisfaction when we compare ourselves to unrealistic advertising imagery.
Correct your spelling
overspending
However
, advertisements are not wholly bad. Some ads
can positively influence us by promoting causes like health, education or environmentalism. Adverts for charities and social messages make us think about important issues facing society. And responsibly made ads
inform us about products we may find useful. While
ads
can manipulate us, we can also
exercise our own judgement.
In conclusion, advertising has significant power to direct people
's thinking, and the prevalence of consumerist messages can negatively shape values. But advertising is not an exclusively malign influence. Some ads
can have socially beneficial impacts. With critical thinking, we can also
moderate its effects on our lives. Overall
, the effects are mixed, and
so I do not fully agree that Correct word choice
apply
ads
only have negative consequences.Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay exhibits a well-structured progression of ideas, making it easy to follow. However, providing more specific examples and data could strengthen your argument further.
task achievement
You address the prompt well, acknowledging both the negative and positive aspects of advertisements. To enhance your task response, you could delve deeper into specific examples or studies that highlight these impacts.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction sets a clear tone for the essay, providing a balanced view, which is maintained throughout.
supported main points
Your essay successfully covers both sides of the argument, including benefits and drawbacks of advertisements.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?